Hi Super,
I know what you are going through, and I wouldny mind betting almost everyone here at ssc has been through the same thing. I have honestly lost count of the times I tried to quit.
But each time I have learnt something which I have taken with me to my next attempt. I takes time, well it did for me, but it is all valuable information.
Be aware of what made you slip this time and dont let it happen next time.
Sure you have to make changes. In my experience to quit smoking is not just no longer smoking, there are a whole heap of other things I have had to change. Surprisingly it worked very well.
My theory is that if you remove one thing from your life you will miss that one thing, and you will focus on that one thing. Its easy to focus on it because it is the only thing that has changed and you are feeling crappy.
What I did this time and so far it has been succesful, is to change many things. I have changed my whole lifestyle.
I stopped smoking. I stopped caffiene. I stopped alcohol. I stopped junk food. My body was so confused !!! but it worked. I guess my system was so shocked that it didnt know what it was missing most.
I started eating healthy meals three times a day, hell, I even eat breakfast, now this was a new and unheard of concept and it has worked wonders. I exercise now too. Nothing too taxing but certainly much more than I did before.
I also changed small things in my daily routine just to confirm to myself that things were different now. simple things like sitting in a different place to eat meals. taking a different route to work. answering the phone with the other hand.
These changes my become permanent, who knows ? But in the first instance I have told myself that they are temporary. I love a tall cold beer as much as anybody, but I know that this is a trigger for me and so in the meantime I have stopped drinking ( well apart from a glass of red wine now and then)
I'm not trying to preach or say my way is right, but it has worked for me and perhaps you can take a few thing from it which may help you. I know only too well how you are feeling and I offer my sympathy.
Learn from the past and makes changes so that the same thing does not happen again.
By the way...I feel totally amazing !!! these changes have literal