2tone,
You ask why so many slip up? Well, I think that's because this is one of the hardest addictions to break and it's an addiction that has been with most of us since we were children. We don't know any other way of life. So it stands to reason that, at times, some may faulter because they aren't truly ready to give up something that has always been there for them. And, some faulter because we are all human and we ALL make mistakes. I'm not saying that it's good or right to slip, but just please, have compassion for those that do. This isn't easy and we all need to have compassion for what others are going through.
Next, you ask about the "one day at a time" philosophy. Well, when I first quit here, I didn't get that either. I thought, "I can 'say' one day at a time, but then tomorrow, I can't smoke then either! So what's the point of 'one day at a time?'" But then, one day, I was ready to give up. I was done quitting. But I told myself, "I'll go to the store in 5 minutes." And then when 5 minutes came around, I decided that I would eat dinner first, so I made myself some dinner. Then, a TV show came on that I wanted to see, and I didn't want to go to the store and miss the show, so I watched it. And then, another one came on, so I watched it. And then it was time for bed. I made it through by taking it "5 minutes at a time" because even 1 day was too long! And by taking it 5 minutes at a time, I was able to stay quit. But if I had looked at it as "I'm quitting forever," I would NOT have made it through that event because forever was too long. 1 day was too long. I had to concentrate on the present, and ONLY on the present and was able to stay smoke free. Sometimes, that's what it takes.
Each day, even each craving, we make a decision whether we will stay smoke free or not. It's not a decision that's made once and then it's over. We have to keep making the decision to keep our promise to ourselves. We always have a choice. That's why we say take it a day at a time, or even 5 minutes at a time. The minutes and the days add up and before you know it, you're at a comfortable quit, but forever is just too long for many.
I think you've got a good philosophy that works for you and I'm not trying to change your thinking at