Take some deep breaths and try to relax....you're just seeing first hand what beating an addiction entails. The first couple of weeks of withdrawal from nicotine are pretty danged tough. Anger is one of the symptoms. After all, you have cut that junky off from his fix....he is gonna raise some hell.....and that is likely to show up in your behavior.
Don't hang your head in shame....actually you should reach around and pat yourself on the back. You are winning or the beast wouldn't be putting up a screaming fit.
Apologize for your outburst....explain that you are quitting smoking and merely 'lost it'?? there shouldn't be shame associated with quitting smoking.....only pride. Then you need to make some plans.....how are you going to handle the next onset of anger? I bet you can feel it approaching?? that is the time to excuse yourself from whatever the situation or conversation. Take a short walk, get an icey drink, splash your face with cold water, do some deep breathing and get yourself back into focus. You will soon find that you can control these episodes and over the course of time they should become less intense. when I quit, my family would occasionally roll their eyes and make references to 'Sybil' appearing.
I never realized I had so much pent up emotion. I think I had been hiding behind my smokes?? I think we all do to some extent.
Admit to yourself first what happened and then go make ammends with the workers/friends. if you are straightforward and sincere, I am sure you are gonna find at least acceptance and probably some support and understanding? Don't let this fester and eat at you....get it out and be done with it right away.
and hang tough....you are doing a great job....are you remembering rewarding yourself??
Katy
p.s. check out your sense of humor....I bet you find it more intense too! ;)
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 1/4/2002
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1623
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 64,932
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $8926.5
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 211 [B]Hrs:[/B] 17 [B]Mins:[/B] 39 [B]Seconds:[/B] 36
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Quit Meter
$159,670.00
Amount Saved
-
Quit Meter
Days: 5367
Hours: 1
Minutes: 35
Seconds: 44
Life Gained
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Quit Meter
45620
Smoke Free Days
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Quit Meter
912,400
Cigarettes Not Smoked
