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Today was my Quit day - But I already screwed up. :(


meagain
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meagain
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19 years ago 0 20 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Wow. Great posts. BreakingFree - excellent. Actually maybe I 'want' to quit after all. Smoking is SUCH a PITA and frankly, I feel like cr*p. I quit for TEN years and started up about 4? years ago. How stupid is that? I guess I got a tad depressed at that time and the habit stuck. I didn't care enough. I had no good reason not to care either! Unfortunately, I've been smoking in my home office and today I'm going to clean & disinfect the heck out of it so I can come in here tomorrow. I guess I could throw this 1/2 pack away but I'll probably go dig in the garbage can for them (yes, I've done that!). Maybe I could soak them in water, but I might retrieve them and dry them out (yes, I've done that!). So either I soak them & pulverize them or I just give up for today & start tomorrow. LOL OK - Bargaining here... Maybe I'll just have a couple today to get used to the concept and delegate this to smoking only outside where I have to stand there like an idiot and ponder what the heck I'm doing to myself. Yes. I'll do that. That way I can start getting my head in gear. I'm also going to read thru this site for motivaton. I think this site will be most helpful. Just the posts on this thread alone really hit me. I know I can do this cuz I did it before. Even about a year ago with the patch for about 4 days. It really wasn't a big deal if memory serves me. I think a year ago I just didn't want it enough and had bad things happening in my life. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 0 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 0 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $0 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 0 [B]Mins:[/B] 0 [B]Seconds:[/B] 0

  • Quit Meter

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    Days: 6596 Hours: 22

    Minutes: 50 Seconds: 11

    Life Gained

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meagain
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meagain
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19 years ago 0 20 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Yes, I've done the questionnaire. It told me most other people that want to quit want to more than me. And there aren't really any triggers to my smoking. I just smoke. Mostly I think my issue is being plastered in my home office behind a computer and I obsessively and absent-mindedly smoke. I've accidentally had 2 cigs going at once. It's a physical habit. I need to get out of this room and onto my laptop elsewhere as this has turned into my "smoking room". I also need to replace this with a good habit (exercise) which I've also neglected. Gosh - I disgust myself for what I've become. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 0 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 0 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $0 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 0 [B]Mins:[/B] 0 [B]Seconds:[/B] 0

  • Quit Meter

    $258,322.50

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 6596 Hours: 22

    Minutes: 50 Seconds: 11

    Life Gained

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    45924

    Smoke Free Days

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    688,860

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meagain
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meagain
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19 years ago 0 20 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi guys. I smoked 3 yesterday. Nothing today. I'm REALLY coughing up a storm. Drinking lots of water (though that's normal for me). I slept with the patch and actually slept better than I have in a while. Didn't get up too early. Not sure if that was just the drastically reduced number of cigs yesterday or the patch. I did have vivid dreams and remember when I did the patch a year ago - those dreams were bad and I had to take it off before bed. Right now, I'm enjoying the dreams but as soon as they go south, I'll take it off at night or peel 1/2 of it on itself for a smaller dose. I sure am conflicted about the patch. This morning, I felt when it kicked in and a couple other times my body felt like it just got a hit. A little rush/high. I'm not sure but I think I wanted a cig during those times. Like - I got the feeling but the cig was missing? I wonder if it might be a reminder or making me want to have one? Yet if I go cold turkey - I have ZERO clue as to how I'll feel. It might be a disaster. I wish I knew. I did cold turkey when I quit for 10 years. I quit and didn't play around. But it was so long ago that I don't remember how it felt. I also worked out of the home during that time which was extremely helpful. Being at home is rougher. We hauled up a stepper machine from the basement so my new rule is every time I want to smoke, I have to get on the stepper. Though I always wanted to smoke after exercise so this might also be a bad idea. LOL

  • Quit Meter

    $258,322.50

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 6596 Hours: 22

    Minutes: 50 Seconds: 11

    Life Gained

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    45924

    Smoke Free Days

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    688,860

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meagain
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meagain
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19 years ago 0 20 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I think I'm not ready to quit. I just don't want to and I don't think this is going to work. Even with the patch, I started freeking out tonight and failed. I also think in the future, if I have a bad day, I'll just hop in the car and buy smokes. I think the best I can hope for is to cut down on the quantity. I'll see what tomorrow brings but right now I'm not hopeful about this and might just go away and come back when/if I'm ready to try. I hope you all didn't waste your time on me. Hopefull lurkers can at least benefit. Thank you. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 31 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $6.93 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 34 [B]Seconds:[/B] 31

  • Quit Meter

    $258,322.50

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 6596 Hours: 22

    Minutes: 50 Seconds: 11

    Life Gained

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    45924

    Smoke Free Days

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    688,860

    Cigarettes Not Smoked

meagain
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meagain
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19 years ago 0 20 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I had a blood test come back not so hot. Seems my blood is thickish/sludgy despite taking tons of vitamins, fish oil, etc. It was right on the edge of normal, but my doc believes it's from smoking. That the lack of O2 is making it viscous. :( I'm doing very well on the patch! Around 2pm, I had a few puffs. But I thought about it beforehand and knew I really didn't need it. I did it anyway "to see". While I took those hits, I thought how it really didn't do anything for me. I put it out and didn't feel bad I did this. Actually I think it motivated and empowered me. Made me think I can pull this off. Like - it gave me control, and I think that's good for me. Being a semi-control freak. :) I'm really liking the patch. I won't do it for months like the boxes say, but will shorten this quite a bit. Maybe 1-2 weeks? Not sure. Last time I quit, it seemed I had a harder time about 4 days into it than at the beginning. I hope that doesn't happen again. IDK - Maybe I'm just postponing the inevitable pain of withdrawl with the patch but at least I'm getting used to not smoking???? Not sure what to do about the patch issue.

  • Quit Meter

    $258,322.50

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 6596 Hours: 22

    Minutes: 50 Seconds: 11

    Life Gained

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    45924

    Smoke Free Days

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    688,860

    Cigarettes Not Smoked

meagain
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meagain
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19 years ago 0 20 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
BTW - You guys are great! It's amazing how people have stayed here long after quitting to help others. I'm a bit surprised at the high level of support here. I didn't know this existed else I'd try to quit prior to this. Whoa - Notice I said "'TRY' to quit"? [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 0 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 0 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $0 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 0 [B]Mins:[/B] 0 [B]Seconds:[/B] 0

  • Quit Meter

    $258,322.50

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 6596 Hours: 22

    Minutes: 50 Seconds: 11

    Life Gained

  • Quit Meter

    45924

    Smoke Free Days

  • Quit Meter

    688,860

    Cigarettes Not Smoked

meagain
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meagain
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19 years ago 0 20 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I know, I shouldn't have them in the house at this point. I do think I'm doing well with having them in the house and just doing the 3 puffs. But while I might feel all good and strong now - come 8pm after dinner - I might lose it and smoke. I also get some comfort knowing they're in the house. LOL You're right though. I need to quit playing games and destroy them. too risky. [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 0 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 0 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $0 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 0 [B]Mins:[/B] 0 [B]Seconds:[/B] 0

  • Quit Meter

    $258,322.50

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 6596 Hours: 22

    Minutes: 50 Seconds: 11

    Life Gained

  • Quit Meter

    45924

    Smoke Free Days

  • Quit Meter

    688,860

    Cigarettes Not Smoked

Nosmo King
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Nosmo King
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19 years ago 0 385 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
The following is entirely my opinion. The patch makes it harder, not easier to quit. I tried the patch for a few days and the side effects I experienced are worse than nicotine withdrawal. You are not cheating by using the patch, but you may be making things a little harder for yourself. Like I said, this is my experience talking. I have felt better since I stopped using the patch 3 days ago, and I am now on Day 7 and still going strong. You can do it! With the patch, or without. Just do it!

  • Quit Meter

    $45,464.76

    Amount Saved

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    Days: 5385 Hours: 8

    Minutes: 0 Seconds: 59

    Life Gained

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Nosmo King
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Nosmo King
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19 years ago 0 385 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Wow, Fear Less, you really have thought this through! :) And meagain, I agree that you really do want to quit. Otherwise, you would not even be here. I always thought smoking was something I could take or leave. Until I tried to quit. Then, I realized that it had me completely. I have tried to quit about 15 times. I once quit for 2 months, another time for 1 month. I never felt that I was addicted to the nicotine that much. Nicotine is a non-issue for me. I did use the patch the first few days of this quit but quickly removed it when I realized that it did nothing but making it harder for me. Believe me when I tell you that the nicotine is not the problem. The problem is that you believe that smoking relieves stress and helps you. Both times I quit for relatively long periods (once with the gum and once cold turkey) I knew that the problem was not the drug. The problem was my attitude about smoking. I kept thinking that smoking was something prized that I wanted and I felt bad when I couldn't do it. You have to think differently in respect to smoking. You have to believe that you are not giving up anything. You are embracing something else. (Much of this way of thinking has to do with a book I read. I cannot mention the title here. If I get IM to work, I will be happy to discuss this book with anyone or everyone.) So, the bottom line is to not think of smoking as a sacrifice. There is nothing great about smoking. It tastes like crap, it makes your breath smell, it kills you slowly, it depletes your energy, and it makes you lose self-respect. Smoking does not give you anything. It only takes away what you have. You are not giving up smoking. You are embracing a new way of life, a new way of thinking, and not polluting your lungs with chemicals that can trigger cancer. Be proud. Embrace life. Give your lungs a break. Stop smoking. Just never smoke again. It is not a sacrifice. It is a reward to yourself. Mira :) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/15/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 9 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 189 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $31.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 17 [B]Mins:[/B] 32 [B]Seconds:[/B] 37

  • Quit Meter

    $45,464.76

    Amount Saved

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    Days: 5385 Hours: 8

    Minutes: 0 Seconds: 59

    Life Gained

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    45924

    Smoke Free Days

  • Quit Meter

    918,480

    Cigarettes Not Smoked

Nosmo King
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Nosmo King
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19 years ago 0 385 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I must ask, 10 years is a long time to quit and then smoke again. What happened there ? Glad you are quit, meagain, stay quit! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/15/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 9 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 193 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $31.5 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 17 [B]Mins:[/B] 48 [B]Seconds:[/B] 57

  • Quit Meter

    $45,464.76

    Amount Saved

  • Quit Meter

    Days: 5385 Hours: 8

    Minutes: 0 Seconds: 59

    Life Gained

  • Quit Meter

    45924

    Smoke Free Days

  • Quit Meter

    918,480

    Cigarettes Not Smoked


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