An enthusiastic quitter with minimal withdrawal symptoms and no craves, and who was feeling really good about it suddenly makes a concious decision to return to smoking. Something is really wrong here.
I don't think you're being honest with yourself. I don't think you are ready to quit yet. You are too quick to use your self-described qualities of "stubborn" and "individualist" as excuses to smoke. If you really wanted to quit you would be using your "stubborn individualist" qualities in a proactive, pro-quit way. You are an addict and are still too willing to allow the addiction to control your life.
There is still time to get through the worst part of the quit before your husband comes back. You said in another thread that you wanted him to come home to a smoke-free wife; that it would be a wonderful surprise for him.
Stay close, Na. Keep reading, keep learning, keep trying to mentally get yourself into a place where the addiction has less of a hold. We're quite willing to communicate with you while you make that journey so you don't have to be a stranger. In my opinion, successful quits often begin long before the last cigarette is smoked.
Shevie
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 5/23/2005
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 361
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 7,233
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1371.8
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 67 [B]Hrs:[/B] 10 [B]Mins:[/B] 13 [B]Seconds:[/B] 35
