Phillip.... I could hear you yelling for help all the way down here in Florida :8o: These feelings will pass as you already know.
I have been sitting her for the last 2+ hours with a smoker. I am in the home of my ex-sister in law. Usually when we come to visit we sit up for half the night, smoke, chat, laugh, have a couple of drinks, maybe even cry, and share the time together. You see we've been sisters for about 20 years and that kind of bond doesn't just go away. Tonight has been difficult. I decided to pass on the drinks, wanted to keep my wits about me. The chat hasn't been the same. This is my first visit since quitting and I must admit it has been slightly difficult.
The one thing I keep reminding myself is how far I have come. I now live in a non-smoking world. I do not want to go back to the control of the addiction. I am thankful to be quit and I am grateful for the days on my meter. Those days mean that I am not a slave anymore. Guess what Phillip? You are not a slave any more either. Junkie thinking comes and junkie thinking goes. You recognize it for what it is and then let it go. Laugh the craves off because they no longer control your every move.
Think about it, when we smoked, we were always looking for that next fix. The craves may come out of no where and blindside us; however, we also have mass days of freedom when the craves do not bother us. Isn't that great? We never had that as smokers. We were in constant withdrawal at all times. We are not in withdrawal anymore. We are now in recovery. The seperation is over and now we are moving forward. One step at a time, my friend. Nothing has changed. The rules are still the same. N.O.P.E. and one foot in front of the other. You are doing great.
I will not smoke and neither will you. Promise. Good night.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 7/1/2005
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 337
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 6,741
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1179.5
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 29 [B]Hrs:[/B] 16 [B]Mins:[/B] 54 [B]Seconds:[/B] 42
