CJ,
Recovery from addiction and depression often go hand in hand. I guess that does not make you feel any better, but I do want you to know that this is 'a sort of normal'. Many of us before you (including me) have been through this, and many are behind you. There is a straightforward chemical explanation - you need to wait for your dopamine levels to return to normal - your brain chemistry has to even out again after years of being 'poisoned' by smoking....and this will take a few weeks, and yes, even months. I have been there and shed the tears, believe me. And yes, I too quit fairly easily and did not experience real problems until later in my quit.
You now have to wait and see whether things improve of their own accord, or whether you should seek medical intervention. Generally speaking, if a depression lasts around 10-14 days, then you should seek medical help. If you return to 'a sort of normal' ie you stop crying before then, then it is kind of up to you where you go next. I continued on my own without anti-depressants, and Yes, I returned to 'normal', but it took a few months (but then I had been smoking a long time). There is a depression test that you can take at http://www.depressioncenter.net/ which may help.
So maybe you are not clinically depressed, but 'just craving' (that 'just' is ironic). Well, this is common around anniversaries. It is a kind of grieving for the life we have left behind, and it is part of the process of recovery. Yes, it needs patience, but it also needs understanding of what you have been through. It is OK that you have put on a few pounds - you will lose them when you are ready. It is OK that you feel angry/depressed/panicky/bereft - it will pass. It is OK that you have junkie thoughts - recognise them....say 'Hi' and then KICK them out. Do not doubt your achievements of the last 6 months - you have a lifetime full of celebration ahead. Yes, there will be days now when you feel bad, but a good day follows a bad day, and years of congratulations and pride (and extra money) are before you. I suggest that you should start some serious reward planning - and I mean serious.....what have you always wanted to do? A cruise? A trip around Europe? Do not set the bar too low. Or maybe something more
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Quit Meter
$8,922.00
Amount Saved
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Quit Meter
Days: 789
Hours: 8
Minutes: 41
Seconds: 5
Life Gained
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5948
Smoke Free Days
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Quit Meter
35,688
Cigarettes Not Smoked
