Original Post by: Pete

Thanks for this, Ashley.

 

I do often wish to respond to other member's posts but worry that either I'll come out with empty platitudes or say something that does more harm than good. I suppose when I am not sure the best thing to do is stay silent, but sometimes it is difficult to do that.

 

Then again ... when I post I am always delighted with any response I get, because it means somebody out there is listening.

 

 

Original Post by: Ashley - Health Educator

Hello everyone,

I think now is a great time to have a little refresher on the Dos and Don'ts of supporting online. The below information was taken from the article "Supporting Fellow Members" which can be found on the forums main page. I encourage everyone to have a read of it.  Even if you have already read it, it is a good idea to review.  Sometimes we need a refresh in what we already know. The following dos and don'ts give good basics to follow.  Please share your thoughts.

Don’ts
•Don’t interrupt the thread. If you feel your response will change the thread topic it is best to create a new thread.
•Don’t tell members you know just how they feel. You may be able to relate but you will never fully grasp what others are going through.
•Don’t say things like "get over it", "it could have been worse", or "you need medication".
•Don’t force your values on others.
•Don’t expect that others will always agree with you or see things the way you do.
•Don’t promise or promote quick fixes.
•Don’t give advice. Explain what has worked for you or ideas you have but do not "lecture".
•Don’t press a member for personal details.

Dos
•Do use the member’s name, this shows the member that you see them as an individual and not just another post.
•Do acknowledge the member for the unique and special person they are.
•Do say thank you for helpful responses.
•Do create many threads to talk about various topics.
•Do post in threads to support fellow members.
•Do offer your perspective.
•Do explain other options in terms of actions to take.
•Do say things like "what you are feeling is understandable" and "I am listening".
•Do be nonjudgmental and accepting.
•Do accept other people’s perspectives.
•Do understand that people do not choose to be depressed, anxious, or addicted.
•Do understand that overcoming mental illness and addiction takes time and hard work.
•Do recognize a member’s successes and help the member to appreciate their achievements.
•Do share your personal experiences.
•Do understand that you do not have to solve the problem for the member.

Ashley, Health Educator

Ashley, Health Educator