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Depression Episodes

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 653

Hi there,

Feel free to refer to the program, section 2, where making and setting specific and realistic goals is discussed. Reachable goals early in the program are 'the goal'!

Tiana, Health Educator

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Are you saying you can not do something unless it is a goal? Sounds to me like confining yourself to a box, limiting yourself to what you can safely do. Does exposure not work for depression? What is the motivation if all you are going to do is what you already know you can do? Don't take this for aggression. It is not, it is curiosity. I suppose I could ask my therapist.

I'll accept that if you are severely depressed it is hard to get motivated. Well actually almost impossible.

I have said before that I do not have depression, (so why am I here,) I have Bipolar friends.

Davit

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3046

If we can be successful in our small goals, we can get a sense of accomplishment as a motivator. If we can be successful in most of our sub-goals, the big goal is almost done.

Therefore learn to CULTIVATE THE HABIT OF MAKING SMALL GOALS, although these small goals may or may not be appealing to our ego.

The big goal is appealing and motivating. The big goal takes days, weeks , months or years of continual self-motivation. Most of us here have a relatively unstable psyche and we have to take this in consideration when we setup our goals. Our weak psyche may not be able to handle such a large load in our mind, or for such a long time. Bite off what you can chew. Decide how much and what you can handle at one time.

If the big goal is broken down into daily or hourly small goals, they can guide us to our intended destinations.

There are similarities between goal setting and soft-ware design. There are the top-down design(big goal) and the bottom-up(small goal) approach. Which way works better for an individual(programmer) depends a lot of factors.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

I find I have to disagree here and keep in mind that it is only my opinion and what works for me.

Setting a size on goals is a set up for failure. Yes they should be in reason but. it is not the size of goal that is important so much as the attempt. There are no failures. The thing is to try and to be happy with what you achieve. If the goals are too big you won't manage and be unhappy. If they are too small then you will feel you are not trying hard enough. I use duel purpose goals, a small goal inside a bigger one or many small ones. I aim for the bigger one to get my butt in gear and settle for what I get which usually covers some of the smaller ones. Breaking a bigger goal into many small ones makes the chance of attaining it more likely. But once again this is only my opinion and what works for me.

Davit.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 52

MMS,

I really like your blogs and messages... I almost feel like you are holding me accountable for the small goals I set (I mean this in a positive sense). I set very small goals and in the beginning I was even getting depressed about how low my goals were... off course it was even getting worse if I couldn't even meet those goals. Currently I'm meeting my small goals most of the time, which made life more bearable and less frustrating.

So please keep the blogs and messages coming, they're very helpful for me.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3046

Often we consider small goals and small bad habits as an unique cases as they occur in the present moment. They are considered less important than the big goals. But we consider the distribution of these events, as these events occur day in and day out, they represent a large percentage of our life. Every time we make a small decision(e.g. Stop working at the first sign of difficulty or discomfort instead of staying with them for a while, Choose passive or aggressive style of communication instead of assertiveness style), this will set up a precedent for us to follow for the rest of the day and in turn the rest of our life.

So some small decisions are big decisions indeed and we want to be aware of these "Seeminly Small Decisions".

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3046

Dear Tiana,

Thank you for your support.

Success completions of small goals result in good feelings which are motivation for approach to more actions. Big goals are setups for failures which are motivation for avoidance of action. Most of us are too ambitious.

Therefore avoid big goals if possible. They are most likely setups for failures.

Approach small goals. They are setups for success.

These are my observations. Experiment and see if these are true.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 653

Hi MMS,

Definitely, goals must be achievable and realistic! Or else you are setting yourself up for failure. Daily is good too, as that will keep you on track and accountable.

How is everyone doing with their goals currently? It can be a tough time of year to be motivated... What helps?

Tiana, Health Educator

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3046

One way to have less setbacks is to set goal, in this way.

1. daily goals.

2. doable goals.

3. Pleasurable goals that lead to a HAPPY LIFE. (without too much bad consequences)

4. Achievement goals only if you are willing to do them.

5. Small in number.(Less or equal to 3).

6. Balance them.

If We can follow these rules, we may be able to have less setbacks. Let's experiment.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3046

I am still working on "WORK ON PROCRASTINATION" on the blog.

I want to say something about setbacks. Setbacks are telling you something about you. We all need to make rooms and plan for the interruptions of setbacks. "Your Reality" is letting out its secret when you have a setback. When you have the unwelcome interruptions of setbacks, REMEMBER "Be kind to Yourself" and "Learn something new about yourself at each setbacks".

I hope this advice can help somebody who hits themself when they have setbacks.

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Depression Episodes