I started this to be under Medications but couldn't stop at that so here goes.
Hi there. I am a walking drug store. I have been treated for Depression for, I think, 20 years. I have tried all sorts of depression drugs until finally the right concoction was found. Currently I am on Mirapax for RLS, Accupril & Diovan HCT for High Blood Pressure, Lipitor for Cholestrol, Pantaloc for Heart Burn, and Desipramine 50mg & Venlafaxine XR 225mg for Depression. When.my depression once again reared its ugly head again awhile back, we added 25mg more Desipramine but, after less than a week I was taken off it because it made me very anxious and feel like screaming. Then I was put on Clonazepam .25 AM and .25 PM. Now I am on 0.125 AM and 0.25 PM and it seems to have calmed me down.
However, I (after alot of phone calls and tears and over one month) am finally going to see a counselor next week. I have alot of "issues" that need to be addressed and maybe I can finally get rid of all my inner problems. I do know that I have a very hard time letting anyone in to help me. I have always had it in my mind that no one can help me but me. But obviously this isn't working.
I am feeling guilty about not being at work now for about a month and worry about having a job to come back to. I went in to see my boss yesterday (got through it without crying) and found out that they are hiring a fulltime part-time person. He wanted to tell me in person so that I wouldn't get the shock of seeing the ad in the local paper. Now, as I am typing this, I am starting to feel anxious about who they will be hiring--will I be able to work with that person? Should I tell my boss that I want to be included in the interviews? Oh, boy, here I go again!!.