I don't know if this is the appropriate place to put this post. But I need to discuss somewhere. I am having some negative self-talk as a result and a bit disgusted with not only being the way I am today, but with the feelings I am having toward it.
I have Meniere's Disease. It is an inner ear problem. Mine is somewhat different from the norm as when it occurs it is not a rotational dizziness but it appears if the world is an large aquarium. It messes with my depth perception and I'm quite wobbly and all I want to do is lie down, be still and have no noise. It also causes me to have a mild hearing loss (with the dizziness) and tinnitis (constantly). I had to leave work today due to this. Fortunately in only happens periodically. I never know when it is going to happen. I had to have someone drive me home today as it is unsafe for me to drive. I went to physical therapy to learn how to "walk" and keep my balance better than I used to be able to when this occurred. This causes me to fall frequently even when the dizziness is not this extreme. If I turn in a hurry it seems as if my brain takes a bit longer to catch up with my head. Nodding my head is a no-no and I find this habit very hard to break. Anyone know of a head-nodding support group (just joking).
I was diagnosed with this after the diagnosis of MDD and it has a higher incidence in people diagnosed with depression that in the general population. I'm a bit frustrated that I have to deal with this, it happened today (as if it would have mattered which day). The longest it has lasted was 10 days, the shortest is one day. And the difficulty turning my head and nodding is constant. I have to hold on to something when I stand up and I walk pretty good but prefer to be close to a wall and don't like trying to walk through open spaces (nothing to hold on to or grab if I start to fall).
Anyway, thanks for listening as I said early I'm having negative self-talk, a pity party, and frustration.
Oh, The only drug that my physician states is approved and works for this is meclazine in the US. Though I hear there are things prescribed in other countries.Meclazine is sold over the counter as a motions sickness medication. I think that started a couple of years back (the OTC thing). I take it but it doesn't really provide relief just makes me want to sleep which is good, cause all I want to do is lie down, no noise and no light. I don't have the sensation when my eyes are closed unlike those who have the rotational dizziness and I don't feel nauseated (I guess there's two things to be thankful for). I have very much difficulty with focus and concentration, word retrieval, following conversations. At work I was embarassed, afraid I may appear as if I am drunk or that I may fall. (I work in an alcohol and drug treatment facility). And the difficulty with concentration is quite extreme and embarassing. Also having to have someone drive me home. I value my indepence - probably to a fault.
Okay, I'll quit now and go lie back down. thanks for listening
