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16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hi goofy,

Thank for that. Been feeling a bit like a quitter. But you are right. I needed a break. there is a lot going on in my life and I need time! So thanks!

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

So glad you had the insight to recognize when you need a break. Sometimes we push ourselves to the breaking point! Look forward to seeing your posts in the near future!

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hello Sarah.

Thank you for your reply. This morning, I have barely slept and it is harder for me to remind myself to feel opimistic. But I guess I will read some, vent some if I feel up to it and then I will sleep a bit on the couch and feel better.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 955

Diva, Thank you for the update! You mentioned you feel optimistic. It also sounds like it from your post! Even though it may have been stressful to take a leave from schooling, it will be a positive decision in the end. You were able to recognize how exhausting school was for you at this moment in your life. But this has also given you time to reflect on other aspects of your life. And hey, no homework is not such a bad thing either! You are absolutely correct, all of these experiences will make you a stronger and happier person. You can do this! Sarah, Health Educator

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hi guys,

Well, I still don't have my laptop but hubby is out atm and I have access to the PC. Also, he fixed the screen issues and I can now read what is on my screen lol.

Ok so how are things with me.

1- I am exhausted and sad and crabby, easily irritated, just plain tired feel like hiding, sropping off the face of the world exhausted!

2- That has lead me to isolate myself. I kinda stopped posting, talking to people... I am so tired I do not want to have to keep appearances up... I am changing this as you can see. I am working on reconnecting. I spoke to my therapist, am trying to reconnect with friends yet again and I spoke to my mom.

3- I had to stop school am too exhausted. I had to get a doctors not and have it put off till next year. I feel sad, a bit anxious and ashamed but mostly releived. I need time to put some things in order.

4- I am going to have to work though. I need money, lots of money. I am so broke. I have a job and I should be starting next week. So I will be finishing up one contract by the end of October and starting a new one next week. Both are part-time. But I do worry the work will just keep me tired...I sometimes with I could skip the work and rest byut zat this juncture it is not possible financially. Plus, who says falling off the face of the world would help me anyway right? I was off work without school before and it was well depressing lol. So, come to think of it, work is a positive! And hey, I will have NO homeowrk! Woohoo!

5- My hubby and me is still really rocky. Weird thing with us is that when it is good it is SO goood! When we are doing well we are so happy! But when it is bad it is hoirrible. It takes very little for the S**t to hit the fan with us and when it does, what a mess! We are negotiating a difficult turn in our relationship and a partial seperation may be eminent which scares me sooo much. I am afraid he will live without me and realize he does not want to come back! Well, that is if the seperation thing happens. It wouldn't be a full seperation though. We would see each other and remain faithful to each other. It would be a way for us to have space to deal with our issues. I am not sure if it is a good or bad idea... I am so tired and out of solutions! I just know that neither of us can take this much longer before the D word is brought into it. I love him and he loves me but we need space, is that wrong? does that mean we are over? Any7way, all this to say the marriage front is stil up and down and dizzying!

6- Oddly enough I feel optimistic. I realize I am in a bad phase atm but I also know that it will pass. That I will get stronger and be happy! I am strong and a survivor. I am the knight in shining armor of my own fairy tale!

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

Hi Diva,

I've been wondering where you've been. Post when you can! Sending hugs and hope to you. Hang in there and let us know how things are going.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1288

Diva, Thank you for stopping in and updating us. We really appreciate it and hope that you'll be feeling better soon. Take some time for yourself, keep your stress down to a minimum and keep working through the program. Sylvie, Bilingual Health Educator

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hi guys!

I am sorry I am not answering other people’s posts. I am having computer screen issues and can barely read anything at the moment! As such, I can’t really read how anyone is doing. I do hope you are all doing well.

I am typing this in another program and am hoping it will post well. I am sorry I was gone so long. I have to admit I have been really really exhausted. I went to see my doctor and we are working on it. Because of being so tired and blah all the time I have had to make some tough decisions. I am in the process of suspending my school for a year. At the moment my life is pretty messy. But I will be ok. I am taking the steps necessary to get over all this. I will be back posting very soon. My laptop is in the shop but as soon as it is fixed I should be ok to post. I will let my hubby deal with the screen issues on the PC : P

My dad is in good spirits. I will have more news of what is to come soon.

My stress levels are pretty high lately. I have lots to settle and deal with and I am sad and tired a lot. Doctor told me it is normal for my anxiety to go up sine I am burned-out. I am dealing well with it all overall. Am frustrated at how little I manage to get done in a day though. Bleh, my life is a mess atm…All I want to do is sleep and I can<t seem to sleep very easily or well atm…

Anyway, overall am doing ok though. I am proud of myself for handling all of this so well. Depression scares me and I have been facing it all well in my opinion. I am even managing to get some perspective through it all. I feel like this is a tough time but that I will come through it better and stronger!

Anyway, later guys! Hugs to you all and hope to be able to read your posts soon!

P.S. sorry for typos can barely read what I am typing!

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

Hey Diva,

How is your head? Falling like that is no fun. I had a fall that involved hitting my head a few months ago and I was amazed at how long it took me to feel better. I am sure you're much younger than I am, so hoefully you will heal faster. I hope you are feeling better today.

16 years ago 0 +0 / -0 142

WOW- good deal! specially the willingness to go to counseling with you. i'm glad you thought of unplugging it,too- sometimes
i feel like a little

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