hi Sandy,
I think you are doing very well. You ask "did anyone else find this at the beginning?"
Oh, yes. The 1st session for me was spent working through the tears.
I couldn't see, every thought record was done with me sobbing.
It was all i could do to get out of bed. I was so worn out, both physicaly and emotionaly. by session 2, I actually didnt think that I had got any better, but, I had, just a little, i wasnt crying all day everyday!
Session 3 was a tough one and it took me 3 weeks to do.
I am now so much better. Not well by any means, but it has taken a lot of hard work and also i guess the medication is kicking in properly.
All the sessions seem to bring up some deep buried thoughts.
I still have bad dreams, that is if i actually get some sleep!
I blamed myself for everything that was wrong with me, my relationship, the world and thought it was my responsibility to fix things.
Well through doing the sessions i have been able to set some of those thoughts free. A lot of things just 'are' they are not my fault and not my responsibility to put right.
You are doing great. Keep at it, work through the demons that keep you down. keep posting, we are here for you.x