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9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2508

Davit,

Thanks for the tip..I haven't tried that before..Next time I'll give it a shot for sure..

Thanks:)

Red...

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Red

I don't know if this will work on a PC but it does on my mac.

When I get logged out I log back in and go back to the post I was replying to which will be blank now and I back up pages till I find mine again and post it. If I do it right away it works. It is frustrating losing a post.

Davit.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2508

I had something all typed up that I wanted to express here but the site logged me out automatically again..

Maybe I'll give it a try at a later date. I don't have it in me to type it or express it all over again right now...

I am not sure if that will ever be possible. It's really to bad too because it came from the heart and writing it was very therapeutic and meaningful to me..It may have been to someone else reading here too..I will never know now..

That's too bad..

Red..

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2508

Davit,

Thank you for your insight and input.

The concept of the triangle and these new core beliefs are eye opening for me for sure.

So naturally I am a little anxious as I move forward with these new thoughts and beliefs.

I am working on changing the way I see myself in this new world. I want to make some positive changes within myself and redefine my role in this life here on this earth. So that I can finally find and be comfortable with being my authentic true self..

Yes it's going to take time some time after sixty years of playing my false core beliefs over and over again in my head but I am sure it can be done if I stand my ground and apply myself whole heartedly to this process and let true self emerge...

I want to thank you for reminding me that "Patience has it's rewards"

I really needed to hear that this morning...

As Always,

Red...

:))

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Red

The process of how the triangle works can be used for any situation because it is basically changing how you see things and putting this new way of seeing things into your memory for future reference. It works best with repetition so you don't slide back. Once you decide on something stick with it. Repetition will make it a new core belief. To keep it a core belief you have to believe in it and yourself. As a new core belief it will be weaker for a while than one that is wrong but had sixty years to convince you it is right. Patience has it's reward. I can't remember who said that, but they were right.

There is also a difference between assistance and people pleasing.

There is also the rule of three. Three strikes and they are out till they change.

Davit.

The triangle is showing up more now in information and practice. It also gives a logical reason for why things happen.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2508

In my quest to get well I went on a search for more knowledge and tools to help me today. I came upon a couple of books on amazon one titled The Disease to Please: Curing the people pleasing syndrome and one titled Who's Pulling Your Strings..both written Harriet B. Braiker, Ph.D.

I have started reading the first one and very hopeful that I will see some progress soon..

She is implementing the thought triangle which she calls the disease to please triangle in her book.

Davit first introduced me to this concept and we talked about the triangle a lot a while back and I was surprised and happy to find it in this book that I am now reading..The pieces of the puzzle are beginning to make more sense to me now with this additional information. So I am feeling very hopeful..It will take time for sure but small step equal success..

As Always,

Red......

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2508

I have been looking deeper inside myself the last couple of months so I guess I haven't been posting for quite a while but I do read posts here most every day..

I have been taking a deeper look at my life and how it is effecting me. I started to search on line for information and help hoping to better understand my feelings..

I found a book book titled In Sheeps Clothing Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People

written by George Simon Jr Phd..he is a clinical psychologist.

Anyway this book was a real eyeopener for me and reaffirmed the feeling I am having about my life and the direction it has been going in for the last several years. I have been more anxious especially these last two years and have found myself slipping into a depression and feeling angry about how I have been treated by people that I let into my life and my home over the last several years. It came to a head this summer with not one of this people celebrating my 60th birthday with me on the 23rd of August not one present plus several visits this last year from ungrateful house guests, so I started looking for answers about myself and for help to change myself and my life as it is now because I can no longer sit on my heels and do nothing to save myself..

One thing I found out in this quest and during this awakening is that I am not crazy or losing my mind and that my feelings are all valid. So for now I am still looking for answers and am working on making some changes in the way that I deal with the people in my life. First off there are some that will not be allowed in my life of house anymore and others who will have to change or leave..I am not sure yet..but things need to change if I want to live...

Change is scary for me and yes I am scared but in order to be happy I know I need to assert myself and set some boundaries in my life so that I can move on.

Anyway this is just a little bit of a update on how I've been and what I have been doing..

I have a lot to learn and am still a work in progress..

Red...

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