EvolutionHealth.care

Home
Main Forum
Anxiety
Success Stories!
duloxetine working

Advanced Search Form

duloxetine working

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

your comments are very helpful. all my life I have been very good at hiding my inner self and never let it affect anybody else in my family. its only been (2006 the break down ) and recently when I was climbing the walls with fear and anxiety, crying and hiding in the duvet did they see it. thankfully the medication is working great and I feel strong again. the anxiety is still there in the background but I have time to look at it and form rational solutions. I wont stop taking it ever again like I did in February and just come to terms with the fact that its for the best.

Richard

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Well it is obvious where your core beliefs come from. The ones that are obvious anyway. We say here, the past doesn't matter, don't live in it. But you can't help living it. When you build something it means nothing without the progress that is turning into the past. Memory is what gives it life otherwise it is just an object like the thousands of objects around us. When you look at something memory shows you what went into it even if it only shows the highlights and sometimes not even that, sometimes just the feeling. Some good some bad. Mistakes get marked down as time wasted instead of time spent learning. They go into memory where they can be drawn on for future reference. A lot of memory is associated and although subconscious comes up with any question to see if it is relevant. This is how we learn and we never quit doing it. So if you have in your memory that a similar situation was a waste of time you will question if this one is too. A few of these and it becomes truth.

To get back to things having no value without memory a person would then think all life was a waste since when you die there is no memory. All life would have been a waste because not only do you not exist anymore but neither does all you did. Relaxation has exactly the same value. Nothing. Have you left your mark. Something you will be remembered for. It does't have to be big, and it's value doesn't have to be monitory. It can be time spent with family or friends. Remember it is for the present because you will lose all memory of it when you no longer exist. And it will have no more value than your other achievements.

What I remember about yesterday is that I was happy, it has shades of accomplishment that made me feel good. But in no way do I compare it to what I could have got done even though I'm disappointed that I never made the cake I wanted. It was still a good day and in no ways a waste of time. In the end it has the same value as a day when I could do nothing. See my solution is to aim high but more important to accept what I get done. Most of the happy people I know are like that. They would never consider that they are wasting time. They would feel privileged to be able to do it. Just as they feel privileged to still be able to do what they can. Nothing in my eyes is a waste of time, it is either a learning experience or a reward. I used to be a workaholic, I got that core from my Dad. It made me a loner because no one did it as good as me. (in fact, I am very good at what I do) So why were they so happy. Simply because in the end it doesn't matter. Work as hard as you want if it gives you pleasure, but if it is affecting those close to you then you better stop. Because that is the only time that time is wasted.

Davit

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

very correct, its not situations that cause my anxiety its the negative thought patterns I have become to believe to be true rules of my life!

as a 16 month baby I was left in an isolation bubble with suspected small pox, this is where I learnt fear and anxiety, my early years were spent to and from doctors with an undiagnosed blood virus which caused all over body sores,( 4 to 5 times a year)
as a shy withdrawn child from a one parent family ( separated when I was 4 ) I always wanted to please people in what I did. I don't think I had any other abnormal issues as a teenager than any of my friends except i remember I did live with fear. i learnt my trade when i was 17 and wet out on my own on construction sites, by 19 i bought a house and a year later had a son. i built things up bigger worked harder and amassed my fortune, all my fears were gone i seemed to be able to control every thing with money. my mother is very hard working and yes i see a likeness to her in how she would always be active even now at 71 she still does the painting and decorating.

my farther in law was a surveyor and introduced me to time and motion, a way of optimizing your performance, i created a method of working where i did not move whilst i worked unless it was productive! if i drive some where i have to do lost of things on the way to maximize the time and fit it all in in one trip. no body told me not to waste time i just realised i could increase productivity this way, no stopping for lunch or tea breaks, from 7 in the morning when we get on site until 2.30 in the afternoon a solid 7.5 hours of maximum output. the building industry was always about getting it finished yesterday and i am known as the man who can deliver the results. i still enjoy the hard work and smile to myself when the fluid of my work motion is being created.

i never used to work on weekends and enjoyed my family time, holidays were fine and i love nothing more than watching the wind blow . i don't see sleep as a waste of time as i know i need the repair time for my body.

now i ruin holidays and cant relax i worry about time and that it will pass me by. i have searched for happiness but just don't know what its meant to feel like any more, hence the ''light searching''

i created this in my head i know its not reality just thoughts so why cant i repair it?.i have a great insight of my mind but no tools to fix it.

i have made the first steps of change, i ended doing any of my own contracts as this meant after my onsite work my time was spent in the evening doing paper work (wages, estimates etc) i am now working for a company who has given my security of work through to january and when i get home i don't have to do anything. i have always promised myself to lean tai chi and have looked at local classes, don't know how i am going to push myself to go yet?

i still have these core beliefs which i write down on paper but cant face the fear of them yet and still where my virtual blinkers.

regards Richard

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

light

Any workaholics in your family especially elders? I think your problem is not environment but thought. I think you have a fear of wasting time. Point one, you are okay working. Point two, a hobby would be a waste of time that should be used constructively. Point three, relaxation is wasting time you can't get back. So is sleep. Point four, a quick nap is okay because it wastes less time. Point five, I'm restless on the weekend because I can't work till monday. I bet you hate holidays. Now to core beliefs, anyone tell you often not to waste time, do something.

CBT is going to be hard to do if you can't relax, so do that part of the program. And if I'm right above then look at the clock, time is passing no matter what you do. You can't change that but you can enjoy it. Or more appropriate, you can

allow yourself to enjoy it. Learn to do that and you will sleep better.

Davit

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

I have researched creating the correct environment, dark , cool and quiet and say to myself a normal sleep pattern will return in time. I have changed my meds time to morning instead of the evening. I do wonder how I continue to function with the cat naps I get.

my week days are consumed by working hard, with no time for my thoughts to wander, I know I have to go to work like every body else in the world but question the meaning of my lifestyle or life itself . its when I get home I don't know what to do with myself ? people tell me to get a hobby but this fills me with fear at something else to do. when I am at home I become a part time acrophobic ! the weekends are the worst as I am like a lost sheep, anxiety comes over me, I find my self looking for pleasurable experiences, watching a film but consciously analysing my feelings to see if I am happy. in the past I have drank so I get a relaxing feeling but know this is not the answer and kicked this habit and lost a stone in weight!

I had a discussion today about how do we change the mind patterns ? when I look at the way I have behaved for so many years changing the way I look at things is going to be hard.

the start of the day contains fear of what lies ahead even more looking to far in the future when actually its the moment I should concentrate on. I have satisfaction at the end of my working day which is a financial gain but this does make me feel shallow for associating happiness with money? then it gets dark and night sets in, a time for calm as I know I cant do anything else today but have a feeling of dissatisfaction as im wishing my life away from dawn to dusk.

im a bit lost with the cbt and don't know what I should be doing or in what order?

thank you for all your help

regards Richard

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 11226

Great to hear!

Red and Davit are right stick with the CBT. Once you get a proper sleep schedule you will find anxiety easier to deal with.

What have you tried so far to develop a sleep pattern that works for you?

Ashley, Health Educator

Here to help :)

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2508

Lightsearch,

Good to hear your feeling better and like Davit said..Keep at the CBT and it will only get better.

Red..

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

light searching

I am glad it is working for you, but hope very much you won't give up on the program. CBT works, the two together works faster.

Davit

11 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

I finally have rational thinking back and can take control over my feelings . if anybody needs information on this medication and side affects feel free to ask about my experiences.
I still get anxiety on the morning drive to work but I am now able to question the thoughts in my head and see them for what they are, negative sabotage! I have still not managed to get a proper sleeping pattern back yet but I know in time I will make it.

Reading this thread:

today's top discussions:

This Month’s Leaders:

Most Supportive

Most Active

Most Loved

duloxetine working