Thank you all and I know you're right.
In the past I've not been able to quit for the long-term so my doubts taunt me. Also in the past I quit on my own, I didn't seek out or receive help. This time my quit is stronger than I've ever experienced. This time I sought and am receiving help from more quit buddies and than anyone could hope for. I couldn't be more pleased with the progress I've made with their help.
There was a time when the weight gain would have been the straw that broke my quit's back, but not anymore. I can accept and carry a little extra weight for a time and will do this gladly to keep my quit. I have stopped gaining and am trading fat for muscle weight recently. It's only a matter of time before the pounds start melting away again.
All past quit attempts have brought me here. My quit buddies are taking me where I've never been able to go alone.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 100
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,000
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $420.00
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 5 [B]Mins:[/B] 54 [B]Seconds:[/B] 20
Yes Princess, I have too. I'm not sure how to describe my thoughts, it's odd. I've read some describe it as remorse. That (smoking) was a large part of my former existence and there's no denying it. There's also the chemical imbalance brought about by the quit. There are many new thoughts and feelings that I'm sure are not new, I'm experiencing things in new ways. It's like I'm getting to know my life. Most of it works very well for me but my tolerances have changed in that I'm less tolerant in some ways. Smoking really blinded me to many things especially emotionally. It took the edge off and pacified things that really shouldn't pacify.
Like you I can't imagine smoking again. The more I get to know this new life the more I like it. I guess it's natural to grieve but I can't picture not smoking as a loss in any way. That's like saying I've lost my cold.
I've matured and set aside childish things. They were not "friends" by any stretch of imagination. They were jailors, undertakers and lawyers (no offense intended, just painting a picture). It's time to start healing emotionally. Let the remorse turn to anger then onto understanding and closure. There's a world of new experiences out there to be had smoke free.
So who are you? I know this much, 91 days ago you were a different person and you're not the same smoker you were 92 days ago.
I wish you all the best and continued success.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 101
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,020
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $424.20
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 10 [B]Mins:[/B] 5 [B]Seconds:[/B] 11
Congratulations Aloha!!! Since I couldn't logon on the 20th to send my salutations, I'll send this belated adoration and bump this post. Way to go Aloha, we're doing it!!! Lainey already has your spot saved on the beach in March Mellowville. The ship and cannon await.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 102
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,040
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $428.40
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 11 [B]Mins:[/B] 13 [B]Seconds:[/B] 39
Hello fellow March Mellows,
The 30 day milestone is such a great idea. 50 days to the first milestone seemed like forever especially when the days were already seeming to last forever. I think 30 days is right for the first milestone, that puts it in sight and adds some light a little closer in the tunnel. Great stuff!
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 102
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,040
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $428.40
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 30 [B]Seconds:[/B] 56
That's such a great solution! I really enjoyed my newly revived sense of smell while camping last week but I could also smell someone smoking on the other side of the campground. The smell wakes the addict in me and then I have that to deal with.
I try to maintain perspective for this is, after all, the legacy of a bad decision I made a long time ago. That bad choice will continue to bother me for some time, triggered by these events. It's not their fault I feel this way. They are not trying to harm me, the addict is. So long as they are not forcing me to take in their second hand smoke they are not the problem, they just smell bad.
The thought sometimes occurs to me that others were distressed by my strong cigarette smell when I smoked and put that distastful fact aside when they dealt with me. Courtesy is sometimes difficult and always important, they are people too. So we breath in through our mouths and we can socialize with our smoking friends and neither need be offended or put out (so to speak).
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 102
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,040
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $428.40
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 37 [B]Seconds:[/B] 38
That's a good thought Lainey, reinventing yourself. But I'm wondering, if I do that will I have to update my resume...No, seriously...I thought of something I would like to change now. I don't want to be a hypocrit! For years I told my children not to smoke because it's bad and yet I would light up. I knew it was bad but it's okay, I'll quit when I'm ready. I have an uncomfortable tolerance (and capacity) for hypocracy because I once smoked and hypocracy was a coping mechanism for smoking. I want to "unlearn" this political skill, I no longer need it. It doesn't serve any aspect of the new me. It has no redeemable qualities.
Do you see what I mean?
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 102
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,040
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $428.40
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 40 [B]Seconds:[/B] 23
Okay, I admit it. I made fun of politicians in my last post. I know what you're thinking, he made fun of jailors, undertakers and lawyers too in a recent post. Is anyone safe? There's some filtering going on here but not a lot. I'm putting my thoughts in these little windows and I believe I'm using these titles figuratively (though that's probably you know what).
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 102
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,040
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $428.40
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 41 [B]Seconds:[/B] 51
Congratulations Newme!!! What an amazing balloon they've brought here for this occasion. Take some pictures for us.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]3/15/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 103
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 2,060
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $432.60
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 16 [B]Hrs:[/B] 14 [B]Mins:[/B] 59 [B]Seconds:[/B] 57
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