hello. i am new to this site (i hope i have posted this properly) just started using it today. drinking has caused a lot of problems for me lately. rocky marriage, dui, failed friendships, trouble concentrating and continued anxiety. i too have tried aa and found it was not the path for me, as i have trouble admitting in public a faulted pride. after six continued days of drinking i have decided i need a change. so i searched online and found this. right now, the most important things to me are fixing my health, my home life and my pride. i have decided that i am not a normal drinker and never will be and that the only way to change is to walk away completely. i want to provide my children with the proper tools to be successful in their decisions and know it will not happen if i continue this way. i have searched my soul for a way to feel satisfied in life, so that every time i want to relax, deal with stress, celebrate something or be happy, i don't turn to alcohol. i have spent my entire life thinking that i need to change my mental state to be happy and im tired. i am hoping that i find what i am looking for here and need to remind myself.. one day at a time.. one minute at a time. i am feeling positive about this. i have not had a drink today but i still feel sick to my gut. embarrassed, scared, frustrated and completely nervous. i also know that in order to make a change i need to be honest with myself. i am an alcoholic. and for years it has controlled my life. i don't want that anymore. today, i want something different.
hello samantha thank you for your response. things are good, only on day two but i feel very positive about the decision to make this change in my life. i have gone through all the reading in my toolbox and spent some time reading various posts in the forum last night. i was also able to find e aa where i have requested a temporary online sponsor to get me started on my steps. until i can find the courage in myself to go back into the rooms i find great comfort in online recovery and was also comforted to be able to find support right away. it's been 40 hours since my last drink and i have not yet had a cigarette today. i am a little frightened for work tonight, as it seems to be one of my biggest triggers. but i am working on stress management techniques and my coping plan. right now with my dui i am finding very hard to be mobile in the day because of our crappy weather, lack of transit and having a small child. all excuses, i know but i just found it amazing to find online support right away.. available 24 hours which is what i need. aa kept me sober for 18 months, it was my pride that got in the way. i will keep you posted on the changes in my life and appreciate any advice and words of wisdom you or fellow members have to share.
i was so worried tonight. it was my first shift at work since i made the decision to stay sober. work is a constant trigger for me because i do the majority of my socializing there and the majority of my social drinking. not to mention i am surrounded by a full bar. as a matter of fact, i can't remember the last time i worked and DIDNT have a drink. i sat here today and did some stress management therapy (breathing techniques, stretching and muscle relaxation) while listening to some soft spa music.. and the whole time i was focusing on my coping plan. for me, what worked was thinking of how terrible i felt the last time i was hung over, the horrible withdraws and sweating.. the shaking and anxiety.. and how i DIDNT want to feel that all over again. it worked! (well, it did tonight) and although i am terribly tired from coming off my last good bender (six straight days of heavy drinking) i am proud to say i am on day three of NO drinking.. and i even managed to only smoke 1 cigarette today. today is a good day. thank you for all the advice on how to help manage my cravings.. and teach me a little to relax. now, for day three. :)
thank you ashley and i greatly appreciate your advice. when it comes to smoking i considered it like this... when i am not drinking a pack of cigarettes can last about 4 days. when i drink, they last about an hour. as i am out on my deck smoking i have two little sets of eyes staring at me from out the glass and it adds to my anxiety. when i put aside the bottle, i did so by picking up a pack of patches and my thought for the day... i want my health back. in any which way or form. it wasn't as hard as i thought.. so long as i keep busy. it's been 3 days with only 2 cigarettes... and i am on my fourth day of sobriety. (first 4th day in over 8 months :) ) so far, my biggest challenge has been my husband.. who as much as he wants all the positive changes, lacks patience and support all the same. sometimes just being around isn't enough, you know? i remember that being the hardest part of the last time i tried to sober up. with each slip came madness from him which added stress and guilt and made it even harder on me. i have been reading my daily reflections, practicing new meditations, exercising more and keeping lots of healthy food in the house. i have been keeping myself busy by browsing the forums seeking support and engaging in alcohol recovery chat rooms. my big house and two kids help too, lol. now, if only i could get mr. man on board with a little more support and patience so i didn't feel so lost with him. oh well, perhaps in time. for now, it's just me. i am only in charge of that. i work again tonight. friday night. i have a full day of preparation ahead of me. for now i feel good. i will be in touch. :)
i am sorry to hear you are feeling so crappy. sounds just like the day i had yesterday. i fought everything, from my dui to being stuck in the house, any simple situation in my head i blew way out of proportion until it totally consumed me and i fell to pieces on my kitchen floor. (i was on day 3, currently on day 4)
i realized really quick what was happening to me..
instead of letting my situation be what it was and accepting it for what it was.. i was fighting it.. only making it worse.
i immediately picked myself up, headed into the living room, put on some light music and reflected on my decision.. and the things that got me to why i am here. i did some breathing exercises, focusing only on my breath and my good intentions. reminded myself of why i am here.. and what i can do to make my day better. stopped fighting everything and slowly the feeling of total consumption went away. i had a good day after that.
i hope your day gets better. i find that the breathing and refocusing help a lot. i have been putting time aside each day to breathe and meditate. i have also been spending a lot of time with my big book. good luck :)
another successful night making it through work. friday night to boot. as much as i want to be very excited about these new positive changes, i am still keeping in mind that there will be tough times and taking what i have learned from the positive feelings and applying them to those times which i will be not quite as fortunate. i am engaging in daily afternoon meditations which i find quiet spiritually healing. it also gives me something else to think about. i find with the support of the forums, reading everyone's stories and relating to their problems in my spare time, i am able to keep my mind focused on what i should.. my sobriety. i thank each and every person who posts in these forums because it is by keeping in touch with those who are going through the same thing as me, that i am reminded of why i am doing this to begin with. day five! and still not smoking! have a great weekend, everyone :)
man oh man.. i can't believe how much time i have on my hands! ive been doing my nails... walking the dog... working out on a regular basis.. paying more skin care attention.. the list goes on! also growing is my collection of herbal teas! trying to stay positive can be a bit of a challenge.. i find if i let my mind wander too much i can get into quite a funk.. but as long as i remember to focus more on my recovery and less on what others think of me it can be quite successful. gotta stay positive! i have even noticed a few of our family traditions coming back into play. tomorrow we are having our pizza sunday.. haven't in so long and i am excited. thank you everyone for all your support:)
gosh i know. i always had cravings for drinks when company came over. i think it's because the effects of alcohol make social situations more calming as it increases self confidence.. ect. my problem is i can never just have one. my biggest trigger is my family. long line of drinkers. whenever we get together we party the night away like nobody's business. fortunately, they don't live near me and i don't have to worry about that right now. i've been keeping a stash of chocolate nearby. i heard someone say at a meeting once that chocolate actually calms the effects of an alcohol craving.. and, well, in my mind, can't ever go wrong with chocolate!! hope things are well for you, g.a.t.d.... sometimes the computer room can give you just the comfort that you need, especially with forums you can read for support. :)
i've found that with drastic life change, to be successful you need positive changes and positive reinforcement.
i'm healthy.
i'm glowing.
i'm sleeping, and reading, and meditating.
i'm NOT smoking!!
i'm exercising.
and... aside from the five pounds of smoking weight i've gained (my husband calls it five pounds of health)
i feel great! stay focused, stay busy, pray and meditate. that's what's worked for me. oh, and all of my lovely friends over in aa. good luck everyone!! this is only the beginning.
It’s been a while since you were active on this site. Please extend your session below
You have been logged out due to inactivity.
Please sign back in.
We use cookies to help us learn about how our platform is used and how we can improve your experience. To
learn more please see our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use.
