as it seems to ramble on about god a
bit too much and i cant be dealing with that - its just not my thing
and i think that would drive me insaine.
There are about 10% people in the world that are alcoholics. If you are one of them, Alcohol will eventually drive you there. And if the read the paragraph i posted alcoholics are one stubborn bunch, they would not accept that they can't control the drinking.
I think its great you have found this website, its helped me in the past, i may not be a shinny star example just now as i'm back on day one, but at least im back i guess - my story is from today being written in my blog on this site - its my way of thinking out aloud, and when i read it back i have tried to look at it from a distance. Im not ready to call myself "one of them" and for me the idea of AA is not good for me as it seems to ramble on about god a bit too much and i cant be dealing with that - its just not my thing and i think that would drive me insaine.
Your note strkies a big cord with me, i've even found myself on my way to work thinking, oh great here we go again - cant wait for my reward at lunch or in the evening and my reward - a nice glass of wine. my thoughts of alochol in the morning have been rare, and apart from champagne before going on holiday, i never drink before 12... but ive used about every single excuse you can imagine!
its become quite bad for me lately, and the stupid stupid things i've done - as i say in my blog my stomach flips over backwards if i think about the things i have done, and the lies - my gosh the lies, and boy can i lie so convinencingly . , i've snuck to the pub before going home (i justified it well business-men do it why cant i - I know realise that people with alochol problems do it not just business men) i occasionally manage just to have one glass, but more often or not its one bottle of wine, and on the worst days its been 2 bottles of wine, and a fair few swigs of what hard liquor is in the cupboard - havent admited that to anyone so am quite proud of doing that... i guess we just stick with it!! and make it work for us.
This is from the big book aka "Alcoholics Anonymous".
"Most of us have been unwilling to admit we were real alcoholics. No
person likes to think he is bodily and mentally different from his
fellows. Therefore, it is not surprising that our drinking careers have
been characterized by countless vain attempts to prove we could drink
like other people. The idea that somehow, someday he will control and
enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker.
The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into
the gates of insanity or death."
Drinking 5-8 drinks a night and hiding alcohol is not healthy, I am sure you know that. Also, if you are agitated when you cannot drink that is a sign of alcoholism. I wanted to make that clear. There are different degrees of alcoholism and even if an individual is not an alcoholic if they feel they drink too much it is always a good idea to get support and try to cut down. You came to the right place. Keep posting and working through the program.
ty for posting....let me say right off the bat that YOU ARE PROBABLY NOT AN ALCOHOLIC...take a second and think about it dude...do you REALLY think you are? To be "alcoholic" you have to have physical withdrawals.....and that is QUITE important...if you dont, then just forget it dude. If its about alcoholic drinking, then DONT apply. Trust me. Alcoholics know who and why, if you have much doubt, then your NOT....its simple. If you drink despite consequences, then your an alcoholic..plain and simple.
Welcome to the boards Need2slowdown and thank you for sharing your experience with other members here.
While you are here, take some time to navigate the site and the resources available here. Hopefully you will find these useful. Some of the information will also touch on the topics mentioned in your post about gaining control and the agitation you may experience when your drinking habits change.
If you start to think about your drinking, what about your habits would you like to change? Would you like to cut back or would you like to elminate drinking altogether? Once you think about this, how can you make it happen? Often members use this site in addition to other resources like a support system (such as AA), seeking the help of a counsellor or therapist, or reaching out to other family members.
Keep us posted on how you are doing and let us know if there is anything we can do for you. We are here to help!
I am a 30 y/o man who has to drink every night. I wish I could say that it was only 1 or 2, but it's more like 5-8 per day. As soon as I get off work all I want to do is drink. My g/f who I live with has no idea how much I drink. She'll see me have a couple beers and a glass of wine with dinner, but I sneak off and do a shots in between beers. I used to be able to take nights off drinking throughout the week, but lately I find it impossible. I become agitated and think about having a drink constantly.
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