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Challenging Worry

Ashley -> Health Educator

2024-04-20 11:42 PM

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10 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Naa,
When I was working, I joined Toastmasters to develop public speaking and meeting skills.  There are plenty of courses out there that will help you develop a skill in a particular area, often your workplace pays for it! 
 
Now I see the people brag on their resumes about being "certified" speakers, and it really makes me laugh since I remember how obnoxious some of them were, but once you take a programme, the supportive environment will strengthen you, so you can navigate the less supportive work environment.
 
There's even a free online course where there are 5 million + students, at WWW.coursera.org, with one of the courses in public speaking among many other topics....I have a number of courses I wish to take, but there's a lot to do, and I need to get out more.
10 years ago 0 85 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Yes. I see where the negative sneaked in - In the past I would have said that the panic came from no where because the "reading" incident and the panic were spaced apart but now I see how my thinking affects how I feel even an hour or two after I have had that thought.
10 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Naa

If it was easy we wouldn't have to do it. 
See where the negative snuck in. And you fought it with excuses. This keeps it going. Better to have said, "well that wasn't great but I did it." (I won) Than to keep it going with reminders that you can do it, you have the skills. These are things you know but by association they are attached to the other side of the coin, the panic side. Even the best day will have associated negative memories from another time. These memories are sort of like a scolding parent telling you what you already know and you know how that would make you feel. This is just conditioning and something that will change over time.

Still it is good to say what happened and why it made you feel panic. It is an acceptance of the fact it happened and you didn't die. I think you did good, your not crying in a corner. You did say in a former post that you are good at what you do but still the conditioning made you doubt. There is a core belief here. A negative one.

Davit
10 years ago 0 85 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
So I was feeling pretty good all day at work then we had a seminar at noon and I was asked to read a portion of the handouts. I am not usually anxious if I have to do stuff like this but for some reason I got nervous because the font size was quite small and I felt like I was reading like a 5 year old. After the seminar I felt really bad and had a lot of what ifs running through my head - Like what is my coworkers thought I was stupid, or that I cant read out loud. Of course this is all silly because i do a lot of training at work. The thoughts didnt stop though - no matter how much I tried to ignore them. So of course an hour ago I felt my muscles and chest tighten and felt like I couldnt breathe and I got really scared but I am sticking it out - I am practicing but it is so very hard...
10 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Naa,
Another example of the daily struggle I personally endure, is how "scattered" I am.  I don't put things in the same place, so I get dizzy trying to find them.  This applies to everything.
 
I had a teacher once who put all his stuff in plastic bags.  As watched mom looking for things today, I realized that they(and I!) have something in common, since there's a best practise for everything.
 
Today I tried to buy shoes, and forgot to ask that the shoes they're holding have inserts that come out for my orthotic(or I'll be in a lot of pain).
 
We don't have to stay that way, Naa.
 
I've become unpopular with those who try to fluff me with irrationality.  But it's hard to be at peace, and tell the difference between the wheat and the chaff.
 
Keep looking for that "sweet spot" or place that allows you the moments to make important decisions.  Much of our days are just mechanical I find...
10 years ago 0 85 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Someone once asked me what I think panic is trying to teach me. After I had spat out a few choice words I actually thought on it a little more.  I think I have become more compassionate since this has happened I empathize a lot more with people. I am a lot more patient with others and hope that I can be the same with myself. I have also realized that I do not live in a vacuum and that it's okay to be weak (maybe vulnerable is a better word?) sometimes and it's okay to ask for help. The last is particularly difficult for me to embrace (I have been self-sufficient for so long) but I am embracing it and it feels good. I thank you all for your offers to listen to my daily struggles and help me through it. And I know you mean it when you say you understand because you've been there too.
Naa
 
10 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Naa

I'm vicarious, I may not be the only one. Vicarious means that with our memory of our panic attacks we can feel yours. And we can also feel your fears and wishes. See you are not alone and this is what makes it possible to support. This is more than hand holding this is sharing your feelings because we have experienced them. At first it was pretty heavy exposure and I wanted to run away, but CBT works very well so that the exposure is not a problem anymore. This is what group therapy would do. It is a two way street, by supporting others I am supporting myself, I can only get stronger. It is an ongoing process and I see others working through it. In the end they will come out stronger and more panic free than they are now. I want people to know that when we say we know what they are going through we really do and this is why we can support and why this is such a great community.
I've been there and I won, you can too. But it is a bit of work.

Davit
10 years ago 0 2508 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Naa,
Welcome you are not alone..I suffer from anxiety and sometimes panic not every day but enough..I come here to work on my issues and talk to others that are working on getting control of their anxiety/panic/agoraphobia/ptsd. Some of us deal with one or all of these. We listen and help each other with advice if we can..Today I worked on exposure and was able to leave my house and get a library card. Next week I may visit the library or go one of their classes that they offer..Working on CBT is a ongoing process for me..This was my first time stepping inside a library in many years. I myself find writing here on the forum helps me think things out..It is part of my process..If someone responds it is appreciated if not that is ok too because the writing is a step of the process for me..So feel free to write whenever you choose to if you feel it helps you..We will listen and respond if we can and if you want us too..
 
Red..
10 years ago 0 4027 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Naa,
It's a daily struggle for me too.  It's been really hard to sleep recently, as a result.  I don't have the energy to feel sorry for myself, but it is what it is.
 
People stigmatize us since it helps them survive.  What worsens this is focusing on the uneasiness, since it can spiral.  It would like having a broken leg, and jumping on it when it hurt.  The difference is that broken legs(and physical ailments) often are easier to deal with.  I've been casted 4 times(not in a film) and I've gotten over it.
 
This vulnerability can be a gift, so you and I can do what Davit does, and see the world through sympathetic eyes, and help. 
 
Right now, it just sounds like the daily struggle is draining you, and I go through that much of the time. 
 
Using the resources here, and educator/facilitator team and your outside health team makes life more bearable hopefully.  I'm a caregiver, so sometimes I end up spending inordinate amounts of time in doc's offices(like today, plus travel, etc) but I squeeze some life out, and sometimes can post
 
 
10 years ago 0 6252 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Naa

There are a lot of silent members like you sucking it up and I wish you and them wouldn't. Group therapy works and for those that can't get it this is the closest they will get. Just talking about your day helps, We can't support if we don't know you are there. It is hard to open up. I know it so I did to pave the way. It is hard to ask for help too even though it is anonymous. Others will tell you how hard it was for them. We have been through hell so in no way would we shrug it off. It is still recent enough that I'm amazed that it is gone, and it is gone. Like it never was, but I know it was, and it was bad, bad enough to put me in the psych ward for three weeks. On top of having a broken leg at the same time. No I didn't jump out a window, I fell off a tractor. There are lots of us, people get better and move on. I suppose if I didn't stay someone else would, we are proud of our accomplishment. At least I am for sure.

Davit

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