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Ironic Panic Disorder with Agorophobia.


8 years ago 0 6 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Ashley,

Thank you for taking the time to respond to my post. It is much appreciated. Yes my medical knowledge should be very beneficial. I think the main problem is that I am somewhat of a perfectionist and I don't deal with any sort of failure very well. I think you're exactly right when you say that my trigger is fearing how I will respond to a situation. The weird thing for me is that this only occurs in healthcare situations. I have worked on being mindful to at one time but I don't think I've ever fully implemented it into my life. I have been using the panic cycle in my mind a lot before I give people shots or do stitches recently and that has really helped.

Overall, I'm improved at avoiding situations that I'm scared of and I'm trying to not reinforce my fear.

Again thank you for your response and I look forward to communicating with you.

Sincerely,

medical student
8 years ago 0 11214 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Welcome to the group medical student!

It's actually fantastic you have some medical knowledge as if you understand the neuroscience behind panic disorders you will feel more confident in your brains ability to learn how to cope with panic. It sounds like your trigger is fearing the fear itself. Exposure, a CBT technique, will greatly help this; as will mindfulness and acceptance. I encourage you to do some research on mindfulness and acceptance from a science standpoint as it has a lot of backing, as does exposure. With the more you learn, the more able you will be to control it. You sound like a very quick study so I am sure you will surprise yourself in how quicly you notice a difference.
 
How are you doing today?
 

Ashley, Health Educator
8 years ago 0 6 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Cardio tech,

I know they will die. I know I will do my best to save them. I'm just worried about how I will feel when it happens. This here lies my anxiety/panic disorder. Unfortunately, I worry about my potential anxiety. It is a very challenging predicament. So far the panic disorder cycle diagram has really helped me. I now realize if I can understand my thoughts and adjust my behaviors my physical symptoms will decrease. Well anyway, that is all I have for today.

Thanks again,

Medical student
8 years ago 0 162 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thankfully I don't often have patients die as I am not a nurse/don't work on a nursing unit.  Yes...I've had patients die.  I've put holter monitors on patients and then to find out when I went to remove them that they've passed away.  We've also had patients code in our department and subsequently pass away.  It is shocking and will be upsetting, especially if you've known the patient for some time.  However, you will learn to compartmentalize and deal with it.  Patients will die....they will be in pain.  Just do your best for them and you will have peace with it.
8 years ago 0 162 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Congrats on doing something that makes you anxious.  It will get easier.

My day was okay....very busy....but that's normal.  Patients/tests/meetings....it's never ending.  However, I'm off for the next two days so hoping to recharge my batteries.  That being said...I've got a list a mile long of things I need to do at home as well.  I need a maid....or $1,000,000.....or both.

CardioTech
8 years ago 0 6 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
 Hello cardio tech,

thank you for responding so fast to my post.  It is always amazing too me that people feel similar symptoms too me.  Anxiety is one of the scariest symptoms that anyone can feel.  Sometimes I feel like it's even more difficult for a healthcare provider to deal with anxiety because so many people in the healthcare field will laugh and make fun of people that have mental illness.  People don't make fun of  diabetes patients.  They don't make fun of people that have hyperthyroid problems.  Well I will get off that soap box.

I think part of my fear is seeing people in pain.  I don't think I want to see someone die  period  I am scared that I might feel faint. I had a good day  today though.  I think it's because I intentionally did not try to avoid any situations that would cause me anxiety. For example I gave two shots to people. I think it will be difficult to reprogram my brain to try to not avoid these situations because every time  I avoided I'm just reinforcing my anxiety or panic.  Well hopefully we can both improve together and live a life of Less and anxiety and more happiness.How was your day?

Sincerely,  

Medical Student
8 years ago 0 162 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Ah....welcome to my world.  

While I do have GAD....in the last 18 months or so I have developed Health Anxiety....but it is really only cardiac/CAD related.  The ironic thing...I work in the Cardiology lab of a hospital....and thus know WAY too much about the heart and what can go wrong.  Every time I have a patient that has anginal symptoms....I associate it with similar symptoms I have as well.  Just the other day I had a patient who's angina manifested itself as pain in the upper back.  During his stress test, he had his typical symptoms (with ST changes) and he was sent for a repeat angio.  Guess what I was having for a few days prior (and the day of) his test?  Upper back pain.  So what does my brain think?    Same thing a couple of months ago when a patient who's anginal equivolent was pain in her teeth.  I subsequently had pain in my teeth and...rather than think it was from the weather or something else....I assume the worst.  

You would think I would be able to convince myself that my symptoms are not the same and that my heart is fine....especially since I've had 2 nuclear stress tests and I'm only 35 years old.  

Oh the hell of living with anxiety.

Sincerly
CardioTech (who can't convince herself that she's fine )
8 years ago 0 6 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
 Hello group, 
 
I have an ironic story of panic disorder with agoraphobia. I first noticed I had symptoms of panic disorder in my junior year of college which was first time I watched a heart surgery. I remember feeling faint and lightheaded. I was very scared and immediately thought I was doomed for the rest of my life. This was the first time I have ever experienced symptoms like that before; unfortunately as a junior in college I already decided I wanted to go to med school. I am now a third-year medical student and I have made it very far despite my symptoms of panic disorder in health care situations.  I am to the point  where during these situations my body  just turns off and becomes depersonalized during these period of time. This could be due to the fact that I have been prescribed lexapro for these symptoms.I have fought with many different  diagnoses in my head.  At one time it was thought I just had generalized anxiety disorder. This is definitely not the case, because I only experience and anxiety in health care situations. At one time I thought I might have had some unspecified bipolar disorder,  which is most likely due to my use of an SSRI which causes fluctuations of moods for me. Anyway I know that was way too much information . I look forward to overcoming my panic disorder . Although I am very concerned that I've been reinforcing avoidance and my symptoms for approximately 4 years now.  That may be a prime example of negative thinking I need to overcome. Thank you so much you're reading this.  I look forward to joining the team.

Sincerely
 
Med student with Panic Disorder in Medical Situations 

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