Being more direct and assertive in your communication with the other person is a great start. Let them know what you’re thinking and feeling and let them know what you need and want from them (your expectations). Ask them what they need and want from you (their expectations). Try to understand the other person’s perspective as best as you can by asking questions. By practicing new communication skills and being assertive, you can often help keep the dispute in the negotiation stage.
What we’re asking you to do, in a different way from before, is to experiment with being more assertive and to consider your needs and what you want to be important. Because we’re assuming that you’ve been putting other people’s needs first for quite a long time, for a change we’re asking you to think about yourself first.
This doesn’t mean that you can’t consider what the other person wants and needs. No problem. We want you to do that too. That’s what assertive communication is all about.
Negative Thoughts are extremely powerful, and they can really influence how we feel about ourselves and the world around us. Negative Thoughts can be so powerful that they often seem to be true.
Remember, the only two ways to stop the effects of depression are to change behaviors and challenge thoughts. Challenging behaviors and thoughts will lead to other changes in your mood and the way you feel.
Have you tried challenging these feelings that you've been having about yourself? On a scale from 1/10 how true are these feelings? If things were perfect and you were happy, what would it look like? Sylvie, Bilingual Health Educator
