This is the body scan medication I use the most.
https://archive.org/details/MCullenBodyScanMeditation
One can also sign up for a free 10 day medication training on this site
https://www.headspace.com/login
After the 10 free days they will offer you a year membership.
There is plenty of free meditations on the Archive.org that will keep me going for quite some time.
The cramped living quarters would put a strain on any relationship. If you still care for your family, I don't know why anyone would want you to give up. As a legal parent you have some rights to spend some time with your child. Even if it has to be supervised visits, your child could benefit from knowing you still care.
Hello to you all.
I am a Grandmother. Yep, three weeks ago my daughter had a girl. Steep learning curve for my daughter and her boyfriend. I was pretty excited to see the little one. I had second visit this weekend. We live in different provinces, so there is some traveling involved. Shortly after getting home from hospital, my daughter told me she was having periods of what she described as feeling disconnected. She was having periods of just gazing off into space, and her boyfriend would notice and have to speak to her to bring her back. I was quick to suggest she discuss the experiences with her doctor. Fortunately the next (after baby) appointment was the following week. Her boyfriend went with her and was able to describe his take on her behaviour. I am thrilled that she has a fellow that is supportive and keen to help. Yes, the family doctor described an anti-depressant. Some might say that it is the common post-natial blues and that it will go away.
My question would be, do any of you find that depression is hereditary?
My daughter was diagnosed with ADH with Hyperactivity when she was in grade 2. She has had panic attacks as a teen and young adult. She used to call me when she felt an attack coming on, to have someone talk calmly to her and calm her down. I was reading something today that a person with panic attacks can become a person with depression.
I think I know what you mean when you talk about a sense of community. It is like feeling that you belong. A place where you are accepted and can open up a bit more. I so much enjoyed the feeling of belonging to a group, when I was in a weekly workshop on Mindfulness. I missed it when the 8 weeks of sessions were finished. There is good news though as another 4 week course in being offered by the same instructor and I signed up immediately.
I can see some sense in your wife wanting to set up financial security. She could very well be thinking of how she will care for your child. Naturally one of the child's needs is financial. Clothes, food, roof over ones head, etc. these needs could be causing her a great deal of stress. I know those things were on my mind when my husband left me with our 2 year old daughter to support. Yes I noted that you said you would be happy to see that your child is well taken care of and that you would like to be helping out with the cost of raising your child. I think you are overlooking that many women, with a child, have a need for security. When I was in a similar situation I wanted to know that there would be a set amount of financial support that I could count on and be able to budget for our daughter's expenses. It is very difficult to have to ask for money every few days to buy children's shoes or for groceries. Arranging for child support is not the same as arranging for divorce papers. I am glad to hear you had time to be with your son. The way it looks to me as if your wife and your mother have been working on arrangements for you to have opportunities to spend time with your son. Don't forget to thank your mom.
Perhaps working at one thing at a time would make the future less confusing. The doctor's report could contain some good news for treatment. Once you have a diagnosis and a treatment plan, you can put work decisions into prospective.
Welcome to the group. I have been a member since last fall. I noted your words of 'allow myself the life I deserve." You are right, we deserve to be respected and loved. Self-doubt tends to make me forget that I am worthy of being respected and loved. Being appreciated and loved by those around you can go a long way towards living a fulfilling life. Maybe that is the best thing for a fulfilling life, sure beats a bigger car or rings on your fingers.
Hello Haier,
Your brief life story sounds a bit like mine. I have had a life long depression that may have started in my teens. Not diagnosed till I was 34 and had become what I thought was some sort of physical illness. My family doctor sent me for all kinds of tests over 2 years because he thought I would be upset if he said I was depressed. Found a medication that worked very well till a year ago. Then, it was back. I agree, it can be super hard to ask for help. I have this little voice that keeps telling me that asking for help is a sign of weakness. This is a place where you can open up a bit. There are plenty here that will understand what you are feeling and thinking.
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