I never knew my anxiety was caused by my depression. I know if I can stay calm it helps me slow down or arrest the worsening of the depression. Interesting! I absolutely hate that feeling of anxiety and the physical manifestations.
Cindysue, not trying to sound harsh, but it sounds as if you are trying to read her mind. I do this often and it is not a good thing. You can never be sure of what she was thinking, her intentions, or why she hasn't contacted you. On the other hand, you do not have an obligation to contact her or if she had have contacted you to accept her invitation. I think you should think about what you want to do and do it, she may have a reason for not contacting you other than she was "using you" before.
Just an opinion - you know they are common - so take it or leave it.
Pete, I do feel truly blessed and fortunate to be working - doing something I enjoy. After having to retire from counseling and I got better (enough) to go back to work. I considered a job at Wal-mart or other type department store, however this job (the lowest on the totem pole) was available and it is not near as stressful. It has it's therapeutic value as well. And again the interaction with people and the sense of accomplishment in seeing a difference in their life is rewarding however much smaller than it used to be! I am not trying to minimize, just stating that helping people at any level is rewarding to me and as you indicated a great gift, in my words, a blessing!
Rose, I'm glad to hear that you made it through menopause without HRT. I utilize the same tools too sometimes when I still get the hot flashes and the fan blows every night. I appreciate your not taking my comments harshly as I know they could have been interpreted that way. It is only a cyst and it will be okay (Read Norman Vincent Peale again - lol). I love the comment about 3 lbs of chemicals and the water too. Wish I could get my chemicals in the right places, doing the right things! But I bet you all do as well! We have hope!
Pete, glad you are making such strides! Keep up the posts and sounds like you have a plan of attack on this thing (goals)! I am sure they will help! Keep up the great work! Stick around and keep us posted!
I was given a Belief System Inventory by my therapist last time I went. I had to mark either I agreed with the belief or disagreed with the belief....there was no "eh, sometimes". I always thought I saw things either in black or white. I had difficulty seeing gray shaded areas. Well, I guess I was right in that I do have difficulty seeing, that I see gray shaded areas. It was a list of 100 beliefs that a person can have i.e. I believe it's important for all people to like me, I believe everyone can change, It is impossible to overcome the influence of the past, etc. I think this helped me see some belief systems (negative core beliefs) that I need to work on. And as I have said it also helped me to see that I don't see things as black and white as I had originally thought. I could identify some negative core beliefs that I have, but knew there had to be more that I was not able to put a finger on. I know this list is not totally inclusive either but it has widened my list of negative core beliefs to work on. One point of the exercise was to see how I didn't think as much in black or white as I thought. We discussed it today when I returned along with a whole other host of issues I've been dealing with, but can't seem to get out in this format (yet). Just thought I'd get some feedback on this.....thanks y'all!
Rose306, you are awesome....I wanted to type that about opinions and ******* but didn't have the courage....Thanks! That is exactly what was going through my mind as I typed what I did type!
Cindysue, it's hard not to take things personally, but in actuality it is her problem and not yours! It is not because of who you are, what you do, what clothes you wear, etc. Sometimes it is just "because" and I think about the person that I was friends with (I bet you got 'em too) and I really didn't have a reason I let the friendship go, it just sorta fizzled. I wish I could like everyone I meet, It would make my job easier as I meet approximately 300 clients a year and then people you run into through life. I'd be richly blessed if they all liked me and I liked all of them. lol, I don't like them all, in fact some of them, I can't wait until it's time for no further contact, but it's just my preferences and not them! Some of them can't wait until they don't ever see me again, it's just their preferences and NOT ME! I used to think all the clients I worked with had to like me - what an unrealistic expectation - I try to carry that over to everyday life. I also have had to realize also that some friendships are made on thin ice to start with - and if we truly look at them, there might not have been much of a foundation to build on. All this rattling to say - it's not about you!!!!!
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