Most of the time I feel a sense of accomplishment by helping someone. I do feel accomplishment when I keep my house clean and/or clean it.....but it isn't the same. I've less motivation to do the latter. Doing some of the other things give me a sense of accomplishment or fun....but it just isn't the same. The only thing that "floats my boat" is helping others, actually most of the time, at the expense of sacraficing self. I don't think this is healthy, is it?
Yeah I think you put mine into perspective too. Mom used the phrase to negate feelings or concerns rather than to promote growth, self-reliance and responsibility. She used it to undercut my self-esteem and my emotions. It definitely conjures up negative connotations in my mind, however; I can see how others could view it in a positive light. Thanks again - you all are so helpful and I appreciate that!
I fulfilled my dreams of "helping people", probably why I feel most accomplished (another post in Mod's Corner) when I help other people. I like the day to day differences brought about by the job. Meeting new people (safe relationships - ethical considerations mandate boundaries), a different issue each day. Although I am not working to my potential as a counselor, I find the job in this field very rewarding. There are so many aspects of the job I love. The one I hate (paperwork). but document document document is always been the key in the helping profession (gotta justify your job and show you did something productive and there's always those lovely stats that have to be compiled). Anyway, I like the day to day contact and the individual issues each person brings to the table.
I know it is easier said than done. but accept the fact that this woman has an insensitive streak, expect it when you talk to her and don't be disappointed when you get what you expect. Also, there is nothing wrong with going places by yourself, eating by yourself or whatever. Whether you have friends or not. My grandmother (when I told her I dropped out of the doctoral program due to the depression) said what your mother-in-law said to your husband....I wish you'd made something of yourself. My response was - politely - I did and stated my accomplishments! Accept who she is and the fact that she is going to say those things and you'll probably not let her upset you as much! Give it a try!
Not to contradict or be argumentative, but one can be diagnosed with Major Depression and going through Menopause. (oh, oh pick me - lol) I take HRT for two reasons it has some mood stabilizing effects and I am peri-menopausal and it helps to ease the symptoms of hot flashes, night sweats, mood swings at certain times of the month, cramps, bloating, etc. However, I also must have my anti-depressant medication too. HRT is not the answer for that (tried it once). However, Rose I have a cyst in my ovary that is probably one of those horrid side effects you referred to! I'll deal with it as it comes (like I have a choice).
Stardust, I ditto rose's comment on the rotten. Apples are rotten, people aren't. It is obvious from your posts you are passionate, determined and caring. Replace rotten with one of those (please)!
Rose I can totally relate to that "running back to the security of my bed thing". It got me thinking (wise Rose). What makes that bed feel so secure - we discussed control at one point. We definitely aren't in control. I just feel so contradictory trying to put those to words (conversations) together. Do you have any insight for me?
Cindysue, have fun and let us know how it goes. I like your attitude - just going to focus on the positive! Looking forward to hear your success story when you return.
Yogi Berra said "If you don't know where you are going, you might not get there." Sometimes, I have to ask myself "do I know where I am going?". The other thing he said that I like and is consistent with my way of thinking is "when you come to a fork in the road, take it". Lol, when I come to "Y" in the road, sometimes I got to take it! I hope this helps you! I am glad you are back!
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