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Worthless Feelings Part I

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Worthless Feelings Part I

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 36

Hello Hope,

I am glad that you are getting help with your depression. My depression is surely not as severe as yours, but I too am getting help for my feelings. This is a good site to read other stories and talk to people that have similar problems with you. I wish you all the best.

-Craig

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 10

Hi I am climbing out of the deep dark hole of a major depressive episode. It is comforting to read that the feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness, and absolutely no self confidence I have been feeling can be attributed to the illness.

I relate to the previous post, wondering if my life is even worth living: just last week I was thinking I could not stand the pain and that I should just 'check out' early. Today though is an okay day, and I am glad I am alive to live it even with the uncertainties life will invariably offer.

I love that I found this site, I am working on my first week of the work. Also, I think my new antidepressants are working. If you are contemplating suicide, see your doc, get on some meds, and reach out. I spent alot of time on the crisis distress lines the last month. The readings on this site are helpful too.
Depression is a life or death illness, and there is both treatment, support and hope for those of us who experience it.

12 years ago 0 +0 / -0 36

Yes, it is frustrating sometimes to feel this way. But confidence is one the the key things that I am trying to work on. I am also focusing on shyness, social anxiety disorder, and also depression. But the big issue I have is with my self esteem and opinion of myself. I ask myself if I was gone right now, would the world be any different without me? And I wonder whether or not some people would even notice if I wasn't around anymore.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 9

I have similar experiences to you, Craig. When someone points the finger of blame at me, I have a tendency to crumble and agree, and their criticisms build into my spiral of self-doubt. I am told often that people view me as strong and confident, when really, I feel like a weak, moral-less person, with no self-worth. Like a piece of clothing I put on in the morning, I wear an air of confidence which I really don't have.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 36

I also seem to have problems with who I am as a person. When somebody is mad at me and shows mwe something I am doing wrong, I tend to agree with them and say, Yes, I am wrong in that way. I sometimes have difficulty with self confidence because I don't feel that I have any reason to be confident.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1044

Samantha, so true so true. Even though I'm out of the bed, back to work, babysitting, and doing things I enjoy. I still have to fight those negative thoughts.

health - if I find myself going to the dr. frequently, I evaluate is it because I'm sick or just "think" I am sick.

intelligence - I do have difficulty remembering things, retrieving words, making decisions, organizing thoughts. I have had to learn to accept these and remember just because these difficulties are there, doesn't mean I'm not intelligent.

Achievement - just because I'm depressed, it doesn't devalue my education, my relationships with friends and family, my work ethic, my accomplishments throughout my career etc.

Popularity. I've always had a few close friends, I still have the same ones - pre and post dx with depression. I've even added a couple. I've been able to enter into a relationship

Attractiveness - this is one I struggled with pre depression and do so now. Intellectually I know I won't be attractive to some people but at the same time I realize I don't find everyone else attractive. However, obviously I am attractive to my "feller".

Strength - I get so mentally exhausted from "keeping it together" and this is the hardest for me to fight. I know I am strong, independent, self-reliant, but that get up and go; got up and went and I have to push, push, push. It's worth it, but I have to take that me time for naps, fun stuff, whatever I WANT to do, to be able to maintain what I need to do. I do NOT think I am weak because I am depressed or that I can just snap out of it. I do realize that this is a process as the sessions indicate and that sometimes I identify new negative thoughts and have to work through them too.

I'm a work in progress just as I was pre-depression; however, I am just progressing in different areas at times.

Maybe too much info here- but it feels good to look at it in writing.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2606

Members,

When you are depressed, you invariable believe that you are worthless. The worse the depression, the more you feel this way. You are NOT alone. A recent survey revealed that over 80% of depressed patients expressed self-dislike. Further more, the study found that depressed patients see themselves as deficient in the very qualities they value most highly; intelligence, achievement, popularity, attractiveness, health and strength. A depressive’s self image can be characterized by the four D’s: Defeated, Defective, Deserted, and Deprived.

More often than not, this self image is self-defeating and unrealistic but it can be hard to recognize this illogical thinking pattern that is causing you to look down on yourself. In fact, you may have convinced yourself that you are inferior and/or worthless. Any suggestion to the contrary may sound foolish or dishonest.

You are not alone in your thoughts, there are others out there that feel this way. We encourage you to challenge these negative thoughts and share your feelings with others in the support group.

Samantha, Health Educator

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Worthless Feelings Part I