I remember sitting in a restaraunt with some people and being very tired. The conversation was not what I was interested in so I was quiet. Another quiet person said to me "you are not talking". I said "better to be quiet and be thought a fool than to open my mouth and prove it".
Some times my mouth runs faster than my mind. Some times I stick both feet in. And some times I have nothing to say. (seldom) :-)
I think you're probably really articulate, judging by your ability to write in a second(maybe even third!) language so well...it took me forever to be articulate, but I can't find my composure when there's too much going on...and right now...there's too much going on
Hi Hugs: You reminded me of someone at a meeting. Duct tape was actually brought in and set on the table to remind her to be quiet. It was also a sort of apology for her outburst at the meeting before. So now she says, "I better bring my duct tape" before meetings and we laugh together.
After being unable to contain myself two days in a row, and regretting it, I may have to result to just using duct tape and not speaking at all..I admire people with composure, especially young people. Where have I been all these years
Hi: Definitely, listen more, ask them questions about themselves. Most people are happy when you show interest in them and will love to share their hobbies, jobs, family life. Even if it might not be something you are interested in, there is always something to learn from others. While they are talking I might take a deep breath, a sigh of sorts to slow me down. I look out a window to refocus while listening. I remind myself that conversation is a two-way street, don't hog it.
To slow down your speach you need a distraction.something to take part of your conversation. Here are some things I have seen people do.
In the restaraunt they polish there silver ware or move it around. They stir there coffee that doesn't need stirring.
Other times they will dig in their pockets or purse for something they don't really need.
Or if outside light a cigarette. (or pop a candy in there mouth)
The realy good ones can do this without it looking like they are. They can make it look like they are concentrating. Others just don't and just babble on at a rate that hardly leaves room for breath.
I usually look at the table like I am reading off it and look up frequently. I seldom need to do this now that I noticed myself doing it. If I get cut off, I never rush to try to get it in, I just let it go. There is an art to being a good listener. More people should work on this.
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