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13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1665

Sounds like you have great friends - that's wonderful. Goofy dog for sure, sitting on the beans. My dog is so dainty around the garden as if she knows to be careful, but Charlie the spaniel was a big lovable soft lump. He'd come and sit beside you right on your foot and not think anything of it.

I think you'll do just fine with the surgery, it's the anticipation I think which is worse. If I lived closer, I'd hold your hand through it all. I will be there in spirit though, promise.

I can't take the heat either, do weeding in the mornings but once the sun hits high noon, it just gets too hot for me unless it is a very breezy day or shaded.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Sunny.

Thank you. It may be your prayers that keep me going. I just want to get the teeth done and over with. I had a friend who I think had the right Idea. Just do it. She fell and broke her hip while living in long term care. They said she was too old for the operation, but she didn't want to be slung in and out of bed so she went. She survived the operation but died of a stroke. I'm a lot younger and I'm sure I'll survive the operation and I'm not a stroke candidate so I'll just do it. What happens happens. Bring it on and get it in the past. And the past doesn't count. The future is just the past waiting to happen, only the present matters.

Sounds like you had a good time despite the what ifs. Sounds like the sort of thing I'd like to do. Even if I was scared.

I drink a lot more water now. I just can't take the heat anymore. Makes it hard to garden, but I am doing it slowly. My friend Monica came to pick raspberries and her dog picks and eats them. It is rather boofy (clumsy but worse). She kept sitting on the beans and grinning as only dogs can grin. So there will be fewer beans, the laughs compensate. Monica is one of those people that show up when you need them, even if they don't know you. When I was in the hospital she drove, 30 miles every couple of days to feed and play with my cats so they wouldn't get lonely.

My apple trees are loaded and Monica intends to pick them. I'll put the small ones through my cider press for her. She keeps bees for honey. There seem to be more here too. Every thing is well pollinated.

So glad you had fun, hope your camping goes well.

Davit.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1665

Hi Davit: The children just left about half and hour ago to go to another relative's place for a few days. It's going to be so quiet here for awhile. I do see them again when I take them camping and then again for almost a wk. before they go back. They are very well behaved and loving kids.

I don't use that rolled up edging - don't like the look of it, so I like to use a straight-edge edger and it lasts almost a month before the grass creeps in again. (that quack grass drives me crazy - where the heck does it come from). It edges very easily if you do it regularly. I usually do the front and side garden one day, and the back the next. My one and only crabapple tree is so full this year, very heavy too. I've noticed more bees this yr. too.

Today we went to friends' farm and picked pears and made homemade pizzas and baked them in his outdoor brick and mortar oven. Delicious, and the kids had a great time. His wife breeds dogs and she has five there which we really enjoyed (especially me).

I hadn't been there before and have to admit my first negative thought was, "what if" I get too hot in the sun (today happened to be a very hot one), what if I feel nauseus, what if I feel dizzy because of the heat, because I do sometimes with my BP meds. Well, I just switched it around to "Hey, this will be fun and if I get hot, I'll go and sit in the shade. I'll bring some water with me and I'll be just fine". And I thought of the dogs which I've been wanting to see for quite a while and knew I'd enjoy that. And sure enough, we all had a great time.

I sure hope you get your app. soon. (or do you want it soon) Waiting is so hard sometimes - as you know my story of the eyes.

Saying a prayer for you, Sunny

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Sunny

Thank you for the concern. During one bad bout of staph infection the pain was so bad that I got nerve damage in my neck. I can feel my teeth but the nerves that sense pain are dead, so hopefully when they do pull them there won't be much after pain. I'll manage to get some pictures on here somehow. The green house is almost weed free and the plants are doing very well. It has started to rain now so I will have to watch it close so I don't get mildew. Lots of ventilation, even if it gets cold. Hopefully the apple trees will shed a few as they are too heavily loaded. Still a month and a half to go so they should get some size to them also. I only wish we could grow a keeper apple here. They have to be made into pies or other things within the month after picking. I will put some in my neighbours root cellar as his is a real one, and mine is only a cold room fit only for potatoes. If they keep in his root cellar I will build one like it. I do like apples and there will be a lot. Two years ago I got a one pound apple on one tree. Friends promise to pick and haul away most of them so the bears don't get them. We will see. Hope you are enjoying the kids. Just learned about edging a flower bed with a shovel instead of using that silly edging that the quack grass goes under. Amazed how well it works.

Davit.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1665

Good Morning Davit: So right about the garden. I really don't fuss about it that much to be honest, the perennials take care of themselves. It does look really nice though when it is all edged again and deadheaded. Thanks for wanting to weed it for me so I can enjoy the kids. I mean, wow, what a friend! Wish I could help you out too. I'd love to see the greenhouse and the apple trees.

I understand about the anticipatory anxiety pre-op. I hope you aren't having a lot of dental pain while you are waiting. I've been praying for you every night and will continue to do so until it's over. I like to hear of others' progress too, it does make me smile. Have a great day! :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

Sunny

Let the garden go, you will always have it but the kids will grow up. Enjoy them, I would weed your garden for you so you could have the time with them, that is how important I feel it is. Glad your surgery is going well. I'm still waiting for a date for mine with some anxiety. I just want it over. In the mean time I work in my Garden because I will lose a few days when it does happen. Pushing me and the pain killers a bit but that is just how it goes. I can't explain it but I am very happy without any real reason, Part of it is seeing so much improvement in people on this site, (important to me) and part is the improvement in me. Who would have thought life could be this good again.

There for you always.

Davit.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1665

You guys are great! thanks for being there, I luv u lots. Yes, so true about the makeup and the spices. Davit you can be so right on.

Cleo: have fun camping - we're going on the 13th for a few days.

I think I'm just about used to the SSRI, no woozy, no anxiety, I feel calmer already. Hard to believe it worked this fast, it hasn't been 10 days.

Had my first laser this a.m. around 8:30. It was just fine, hurt a wee bit but honestly, nothing to complain about. Feel great, a bit headachy in the eye at first - weird feeling to explain, but that's all gone now. There was no anxiety at all, not one bit. and I got the opportunity to talk to the doc. about everything I went through since April. Next app. next Friday, then later August, the last two.

The doc. said I could go do what I wanted by the afternoon, so the kids and I went to the beach though I stayed in the shade with a visor and dark glasses and didn't go swimming, just in case, to keep the eye clean. After about an hour and half, got nauseas so we packed up and came home, had a short lie down and I feel great! Made dinner and they are doing the clean up so thought I'd go on the site and see what's happening and later this evening we will play cards.

All in all a wonderful day filled with love and lots of fun.

I wish everyone these beautiful days.

p.s. my garden is taking a back seat for now, but maybe one morning the kids will help me weed. (?) :)

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hi Sunny,

I'm sorry to hear that you are having such a rough time. You have had so much to deal with for so long, I can understand you getting discouraged. But I'm so glad that you "nipping it " and hope your med kicks in soon ...so you will be able to go back to enjoying life as you should...making gorgeous flower arrangements! Did you smile like me when reading Davit's description of too much make-up/spices? Ha! I'm using that one ....it'll make me sound smarter!

I won't be here for a few days....Hubby are I are trying camping again... This time we have a real mattress so I won't complain so much... ha...but there's no interent, or tv....I think I'll last the 3 days....looking forward to nightly walks along the ocean ....everyone take care...I'll be back next week.

Cleo

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 6252

sunny.

I knew you would have a way to handle it. Some times the nausea goes away, some times it stays all day. It is definitely connected to the anxiety. I am taking one tiny tricyclic antidepressant for pain as the doctor thinks it is too small to work for depression. Little does he know that I am so sensitive to these sort of things that a normal dose zonks me out and increases the depression. I think they are like spices and makeup. Too much is overpowering, you should just be able to tell it is there. But that is just me. I wish I could wipe the slate clean and start over. Although I am panic free, some days I dwell on how tired and sore I am and how much time I have lost and then I get depressed. It doesn't help but I do it any way. So back to thinking happy only. I'm tilling between the rows in my garden today but it is hot. This is my way to take my mind off things. Just being able to stay out of the hospital after cutting my leg and getting infection should have been worth it. But I want so much more. I want it back the way it was but too many years have gone by. Time to move on.

Davit.

13 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1665

Thanks for the responses.

I do relaxation every day and remember to do little things during the day which help me relax. I'm sleeping well enough, so that's good, no problem there. I am definitely a worrier - I try and put the "problem" into perspective, then think about all the angles, get rid of the what ifs, then move on. It's just that there have been so many lately. One thing after another. I think I lost faith in some of the medical doctors - they don't seem to care, it's 9-5 for them too.

Davit: yes, must kick out the negative emotions and hang onto the good, happy one. I really am trying to do that, have been doing that for so long, sometimes lately, not as successfully as I would wish. Yesterday I made a beautiful large floral arrangement for a convention (I had been asked to as a favour) and I enjoyed it so much, forgot about everything else. Creativity is a key for me and I try to remember to use that for relaxation.

The nausea is worse in the a.m. for me too but now, it is almost gone and so is the bit woozy feeling and the tingling. that's great, maybe my body is getting used to it. We'll see tomorrow morning if it happens again.

I'm sorry you struggle at times too, does your nausea go away after you eat? I hope so.

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