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Nearly caved in.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 639

Nick - I, too, was a bigger moron that normal for week 3 and 4!!!! It is amazing what and how your brain is regrouping with a greater supply of oxygen and the lost supply of toxins. It seems irrational, however, how incompetent I was.

Check out of reality if you need to...Naps don't take much brainpower to help you heal. You are doing great....keep on posting and reading. Much more to learn about yourself, yet.

Keep the Quit,

Dave

My Milage:

My Quit Date: 1/19/2009
Smoke-Free Days: 183
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 5,490
Amount Saved: $1,441.13
Life Gained:
Days: 29 Hrs: 22 Mins: 52 Seconds: 22

Quit Meter

$53,682.08

Amount Saved
Quit Meter

Days: 1240 Hours: 8

Minutes: 32 Seconds: 2

Life Gained
Quit Meter

5935

Smoke Free Days
Quit Meter

178,050

Cigarettes Not Smoked

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 25

Yep went to the shop bought 10 cigarettes, though not my usuall brand. Even bought matches. Even put one in my mouth and took a match out of the box. I dont know how i didnt light it.

Did the person that said 'the first 2 weeks are the hardest' ever smoke? The way i feel now is way worse than during that time. I'm catatonic half the time, i just cant think clearly. I'm usually sharp as a pin. I was out negotiating a price for a party for my wifes 30th earlier, looking blankly at columns of figures i would have tallied in milliseconds. I nearly asked for a pen and paper to do the sum with, very embarassing. My wifes best friend couldnt believe how much i've slowed up in under a month

. I'm listless, no appetite, cant make a decision on anything. Generaly feeling like a quarter of the person I was. Nothing is getting rid of the craving, its like a constant feeling of smoke hitting the back of my throat. Endless torment, I'm near suicidal with depression. I even found myself thinking earlier 'if this is a smoke free life i'd rather die young'. Not the most rational thought i know but very indicative of my general state of mind at the moment.

My Milage:

My Quit Date: 7/6/2009
Smoke-Free Days: 15
Cigarettes Not Smoked: 300
Amount Saved: �87.75
Life Gained:
Days: 2 Hrs: 5 Mins: 40 Seconds: 21

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Nearly caved in.