And forgiving yourself can be a very difficult thing to do. I knew when I started smoking that it was harmful and addictive. I may have been young and felt immortal but I knew. If I was stupid enough to keep smoking all those years well then just maybe I deserve whatever bad things may come my way from smoking.
And so the mental discussion began. And what is up with this constant rewarding. Reward yourself, reward yourself, reward yourself. How can I possibly reward myself for doing something I should have been doing all along?
By forgiving myself. It really is that simple (and complicated). I think some of us beat ourselves up pretty good over the fact that we started smoking,and the quitting process can be very revealing to that if we are willing to embrace the good, the bad, and the ugly.
I have had to come to grips with how to start looking forward instead of backward. I have learned to be a bit kinder to myself.
50 days down. This was the day that I decided in the beginning would be the deciding factor. I know from reading many posts that many have said; If I just make it to __ days, then I will decide if it is worth it. Well, the big day is here. And, the answer of course, is yes.
In the last week, 3 different people have approached me and in so many words have expressed there disbelief that i have made it this far. ( Yes, I too was one of those, If he can do it anyone can). And that was followed in all 3 instances with a heartfelt, "How did you do it?" Well, I think I am still doing it, so I hesitate to offer advice. What I can offer is my own experience with the process. I can say with all truth be told, that when I was a click away from giving up and racing to the nearest store, and the people here told me it would get better if I would just hang on, there were a couple times I did not believe it. But I waited it out with fist and fury, and they were right. And the next time, they were right again, and if it happens again, they will be right one more time.
For anyone thinking about quitting or those in the middle of the fist and fury.
Does it get easier? Absolutely, yes.
How long does it take? For me, surprisingly long ;p but it happened
When does it get easier? See answer above
But I am different!!! Yup, me too, we all say that
The Deepest Gratitude
Moss
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]11/19/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 50
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 750
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $168.75
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 8 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 46 [B]Seconds:[/B] 57