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Smile....and don't shoot the messenger

Timbo637

2024-09-27 3:17 PM

Quit Smoking Community

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Site seems a little faster

Timbo637

2024-09-05 4:43 PM

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What are negative core beliefs?

Ashley -> Health Educator

2024-07-17 7:35 PM

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Creating a stress plan

Ashley -> Health Educator

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Angry person


16 years ago 0 1151 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Anger came up in another thread and I was just wondering how it's going for you wife, goofy? Hopefully things have chilled out a bit for her? Just curious... [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]8/5/2004 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1243 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 24,860 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $5,593.50 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 94 [B]Hrs:[/B] 21 [B]Mins:[/B] 0 [B]Seconds:[/B] 48
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    $38,018.50

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    Days: 657 Hours: 14

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16 years ago 0 880 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Goofy I wish I had an answer for you, but my quit has been a solitary affair. I would imagine that the dynamic of two people quitting at the same time might be a bit more complicated. Perhaps she is not even aware of the fact that she is causing you such distress. She may be struggling to such a degree that her level of hostility, although obvious to you, may not be so apparent to her. Remember too she may have used cigarettes to keep a lid on difficult emotions. In any case, a good long chat in a relaxed and non-confrontational situation may be the order of the day. I know it is always difficult to seperate the person from their behavior, but I have always believed that people are not their behavior and if you feel a deep connection to them, attempting to make the distinction between the two is sometimes the most loving thing that you can do. nonic [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]12/25/2006 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 345 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 10,350 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $3,622.50 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 63 [B]Hrs:[/B] 1 [B]Mins:[/B] 12 [B]Seconds:[/B] 43
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    $68,260.50

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16 years ago 0 1107 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thanks Rocket, I think this was the reassurance I was looking for. I think you may be right. I think I'm having a slightly easier time quitting then she is. Maybe I want it more? Ron [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]10/28/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 38 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,520 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $239.40 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 6 [B]Hrs:[/B] 14 [B]Mins:[/B] 15 [B]Seconds:[/B] 37
16 years ago 0 43 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Goofy, You are not alone in this one, if you look out your doghouse door and to the right you will see me in the doghouse as well. While my wife hasn;t completely quit yet, she has cut WAY back and it would seem as though I am the reason the sky is gray!! In my case I think my wife is resentful that me quitting was not as much of a struggle as she is having...but that would be a guess. Hang in there bud, and remember you have the nicer doghouse!! ;) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]11/10/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 25 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 750 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $112.50 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 4 [B]Hrs:[/B] 3 [B]Mins:[/B] 3 [B]Seconds:[/B] 20
16 years ago 0 2534 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Goofy, Smoking can mask other conditions. If symptoms persist, please consult your doctor ;p Penitent d1296 :)
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16 years ago 0 1093 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
lmao @ anna! [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]8/25/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 101 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 3,030 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $590.85 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 9 [B]Hrs:[/B] 2 [B]Mins:[/B] 1 [B]Seconds:[/B] 22
16 years ago 0 1107 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I tried to get her to get onto SSC, but she says that she doesn't want to be reminded that she's not smoking. So...on the way home from work, I took her for a steak dinner...again, only tonight she was pleasant. I swear I'll never understand how women think or why they react so differently to the same situation as men. I also figure that she's using me as her venting outlet since she won't join us here. At least if I get yelled at on the SSC it wouldn't be LOUD. Well I want to thank all of you for all of the support and suggestions. Ron [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]10/28/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 37 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 1,480 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $233.10 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 6 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 15 [B]Seconds:[/B] 3
16 years ago 0 2223 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Goofy, i had my hubby read your post so he could answer, he said i was bad for like 3 years YIKES but it did take me awhile to start feeling like Tresa again :) He said its not really your wife and not the smokes but her reaction to the addiction, he said to remember you are stronger than she is and to hang in there. My thinking is that for her as with me this quit is really hard for her, she will get better, i hope this gets beter for you soon :):) Keep us posted Tresa ( GOOD LUCK ) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]8/8/2002 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1944 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 38,880 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $6,804.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 274 [B]Hrs:[/B] 3 [B]Mins:[/B] 50 [B]Seconds:[/B] 20
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    $14,991.60

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16 years ago 0 2417 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Goofy, quit ticking her off. (just kidding) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]1/8/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 330 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 4,950 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1,386.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 30 [B]Hrs:[/B] 14 [B]Mins:[/B] 18 [B]Seconds:[/B] 32
16 years ago 0 1151 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey goofy, I was just talking to someone this morning about what a crazy person I was the first month I quit. I'd be screaming one minute, crying the next but almost everyone I spent time around had known me before, knew that this was not normal AND had quit smoking themselves. There is a reason they are called loved ones! It took me 5 or 6 weeks before most of the emotional stuff leveled out. You are great in being so supportive and I'm sure she knows that even if she can't express it enough right now. Would she join the SSC - you know the support here is bar none!? Maybe she could use a place to vent and get outside help, sometimes the anonymity allows people to really open up without feeling like they are unloading or adding to someone else's plate. You could change your name real quick to protect the innocent :p [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B]8/5/2004 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 1216 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 24,320 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $5,472.00 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 92 [B]Hrs:[/B] 20 [B]Mins:[/B] 23 [B]Seconds:[/B] 56
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    $38,018.50

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    Days: 657 Hours: 14

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