Hi Everyone
It has been one month since the end of Hell week for me. Sometimes I still think I'm in hell. I was so against the idea of being an addict. I started smoking when it was the cool thing to do. When my first child was born there was an ash tray built into the tray in the hospital. When I played basketball in high school. Half time was to take a smoke break. All the adults lit up and filled the gym with smoke. What I was doing was legal. How could I be a junkie?
I felt so bad from smoking (sick all the time and that awful cough) and about smoking. Can't smoke around the grand kids, the house stinks (I am told ever time they come to visit) You are slowly killing yourself. Those things make it hard to have self respect,especially when I know they are all true. I was so miserable with myself that I really had only things to gain when I finally decided to quit. The addiction had already taken my good life away.
This site has been such a good thing for me. When I get up in the morning I run to the site and read. When the craving are really bad I post. As the days turned to weeks I found myself learning so much about me. I found other people with my same problems and they had managed to quit. I learned it takes faith to believe I can do it. It takes education about being addicted. It takes acceptance that I am an addict. It takes tears because I have not dealt with emotions, I grabbed a cigarette in times of sorrow and joy. I wasn't sure I could do this. It takes attitude. "If you think you can Your right, If you think you can't your right" was the quote of the day that made a big difference in me. Post by different members of the site have really hit home.
I have not smoked in 38 days. I am so very thankful. I feel great and my family and friends are amazed. It is an ongoing struggle but I am going to make it.
I want to say thanks to some of the people who have made a difference in my attitude. Lady, Duffis, Lamplighter, Luna, Tresa, Nonic, Mercy, Phil, Aloha, Lainey, Rusty, Audrey, Unhooked, Ki, Kita, Ladybugg,Anna,Kev, Bear, Stef,Jennifer, Bobbi and the support staff.
I would not be where I am today without you. I like where I am!!
[color=blue]BLUE CLOUD [/color]
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B]7/4/2007
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 38
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 760
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $152.00
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 5 [B]Hrs:[/B] 3 [B]Mins:[/B] 22 [B]Seconds:[/B] 41