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It's a very tough morning


17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
I thought I had that box checked that says, "notify me when someone replies" but I guess I didn't. I had my email open listening out for you but never got the notice. Well, I guess I didn't have it checked. This day got really hard. Started out okay but dead gum, these cravings really bore down on me today hard. I sure wanted to smoke sooo bad. And my husband has been around more today too and Terri, I was downright hateful to him. I couldn't stand the sound of my own voice. I mean, my husband was on my last nerve but I don't know why I've been so hateful. If this is withdrawals, I really, really hate this part a lot. It's bad enough to feel like crap from withdrawing but when you can't stand the sound of your own voice, it's really, really bad. [color=Red]3 Days?!![/color] Pfft!!! <---That's me rolling my eyes. Everyday it's a new horror. I sure hope tomorrow is better. Surely, it's gotta get better. ha ha ha We both have to laugh to keep from crying. I've cleaned new site built houses before and that's a hard job. Did you do it for someone else or did you do it on your own. I did it on my own and man, it was hard work. Those builders make a huge mess and especially in the bathrooms. They let everything fall into the tubs and sinks. I'm glad you're finding another job. That's physically exhausting work and makes you so sore. We're almost at the end of two weeks. We're getting there anyway. We should be seeing a big difference pretty soon, huh? Shouldn't we? ha ha ha Hang in there with me, okay? I'll check back with you tomorrow. I'm going to sleep through some of those demon attacks myself. Hugs and Stay Strong!!! Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 13 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 589 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $39 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 9 [B]Mins:[/B] 17 [B]Seconds:[/B] 44
17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Heya Terri, How are you doing? I sure hope your day went really good all day long. I know you're relieved that your daughter got rid of "that thing." ha ha ha That sounds just like me. ha ha ha I know that has to have helped out so much with your stress level. Let me know how you're doing. Okay? Our days can start out just swell and turn to crap for no reason, huh? It's like having Jekyl and Hyde living inside. :eg: Phew!! My day started out fine and I've been so excited about my daughter having a baby but, I've been having to fight some serious cravings today. I mean horrible ones. And man, I've been so mean and nasty the last two days. Even with the news about my daughter, I've had to fight being a world class b****!! I can't hardly even stand being with myself right now. ha ha I couldn't help but wonder if that's hit you too. We seem to go together like biscuits and gravy so I wondered if you were having to fight to keep yourself in line too. ha ha ha I haven't done such a dandy job of it. Let me know how you're doing, Okay? Stay Strong With Me!! Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 13 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 585 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $39 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 9 [B]Mins:[/B] 3 [B]Seconds:[/B] 30
17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Oh yea Terri, I've seen your posts to other people and you're doing great. Your messages are sincere and very understanding. I like that. You're very down to earth and say what you mean. That's what I like to see and I know it helps other folks too. You may not think you know what to say but you're saying it. And saying it really good. You're a great support....not just to me but to others. Hugs and Stay Strong!! Tutti PS Can you believe it? Just two days ago I told you about my daughter and her twins that were still born. We talked about it and I told you how bad I want a grandbaby. Can you believe it? It's going to happen now. Yee Hah!!! I'm so excited. I'm still an addict so, we really have to support each other. Deal? [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 12 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 544 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $36 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 6 [B]Mins:[/B] 47 [B]Seconds:[/B] 15
17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
HEEEE HEEEEEE!!! Another day gone by and we made it!! Yee Hah!! Terri, you've been sticking with me too and you've helped me so much. Just sharing with me the things that you're going through and reading how you've fought so hard has truly been an inspiration to me and I know to others as well. Just look at you....you're batting a thousand! Here you're laid up with your back, so limited in your activity, stressed out about the tissue and bone growing back and praying for the best, your husband is smoking around you and that's so tempting right there, I know you can't get to the store as often as you want to stock up on suckers, mints, gum and all of that, now your daughter's marriage is in trouble and I know you're worried about her safety, and all at the same time, you're in the middle of an amazing quit. I'm telling you, I can't believe the strength I'm seeing in you. I'm truly amazed Terri and I can't tell you how proud I am of you. My God, a quit is hard enough but look at all that you've dealt with in the last two weeks and longer. I'm so thrilled that your daughter kicked him out. Hopefully, he'll get some help. I know it's hard on your daughter, really hard. Hard to stay in an abusive relationship but hard to give up on a relationship for the sake of the children. That's a situation where someone will have a broken heart. But, the most important thing is for your daughter and those babies to be safe. I know that's a weight off of your mind and I hope your daughter stays strong. We will stay together through all of this, Terri. I'm not going anywhere. It really does feel good to find someone that I've connected with and we'll keep right on fighting the battle together. We're tuff!!! Hugs, Tutti ;) ;p ;) [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 12 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 544 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $36 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 6 [B]Mins:[/B] 46 [B]Seconds:[/B] 16
17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hey Terri, I'm here!! I believe the devil is trying to tempt you so, cuss him out!! I'm dead serious. Really chew him out and tell him you will not break. I do that all of the time and you know, what it does is it shows my faith in God and myself plus, it let's you blow off steam. And you need to blow off some steam!!! Listen, your daughter and those grandbabies are going to need you...ALL of you. So you can't give up and smoke. That tissue and bone has to grow back because you don't want to live in pain anymore. You owe that to yourself. Life would be so much more enjoyable without the pain and you'll have so much more fun with those grandbabies without that pain. Keep thinking about that tissue and bone. Just think, once you've recovered, just how many people, mainly yourself, will benefit from you being stronger and pain free. Not to mention those grandbabies and the rest of your family would love to have you around for a whole pile of years. They need you. And right now, those grandbabies really need you and so does your daughter. You have to be completey recovered and very strong because you may have some tough things to deal with since your daughter is in an abusive relationship. We WILL deal with that one day at a time. Okay? Tell those grandbabies how you're feeling right now too as far as cigarettes go. Let them distract you. Tell them that you're feeling tempted to smoke. Children are pretty darn smart and they will help you. They don't want you to smoke. Keep your quit for yourself, for those grandbabies, for your daughter and husband, the rest of your family and ME!!!! I want you mend too and I want you stay right in here with me while we fight together. I'm so sorry to hear that your daughter is in an abusive relationship. You have to be in shock from the news. I don't understand why women stay with an abusive man but I've seen it over and over. Let's pray that your daughter will feel strong enough to leave. She very well may now that the kids are with you. She may be staying with him because of the kids. Your daughter will need your help to get out of that relationship. You know you want to help her all that you can but to do that, you have to be physically strong and able. Protect your quit.....T
17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Terri, How are you doing today? Give a shout when you have the time, okay? I'm doing good today but right now, I'm feeling that anxiety again. I haven't had it all day long but right about this time of the day is when it comes. Ugh. One more thing to fight, huh. I just wanted to check in and see how you're doing. I hope you got to get out of the house for a little while today. Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 11 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 527 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $33 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 5 [B]Mins:[/B] 50 [B]Seconds:[/B] 8
17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi WhyNot, Thank you for the encouragment. I really appreciate it so much. Oh no, I'm not going back. I made a mistake by stopping my water intake and staying really busy. I've increased my distractions and am drinking lots and lots of water again. The last two days have been pretty good. This morning I bad cravings but, the water has helped a lot. I would have to kick my own ass if I messed up now. ha ha ha ha ha Can you imagine going through those first three days again? Oh yea, I'd have to smack myself around pretty good if I messed things up now. I'm so sorry about your depression. I started a thread on Anxiety but it covers depression too. There are a lot of folks who are experiencing anxiety/panic/depression AFTER their quit. I found a really good old post last night that covers that topic too. I have it saved and can share it with you. Depression is horrible. Please, keep talking to us, we're here to help you too. When did your depression start? Was it from Day 1? Please stay in touch. I'm here anytime you want to talk. And you're right, we can do this together. Stay Strong!! Hugs, Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 14 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 651 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $42 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 48 [B]Seconds:[/B] 51
17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Did you read that post called "Withdrawal List?" Depression, anxiety, and panic attacks are part of the symptoms. I was shocked. You know, I fell into a deep depression after being diagnosed with Diabetes. It felt like I was in a Black Hole and couldn't get out of it. I'd find myself sitting for hours, then look at the clock, shocked at how much time passed by, and wonder what I had been thinking about for all of that time....If anything at all. It was horrible. I didn't do anything, rarely even dressed for the day, and didn't want to talk to anyone at all. I would cry but then reached the point where I didn't even have the energy to cry. Honestly, if my quality of life wasn't going to improve, it wouldn't have hurt my feelings a bit if I didn't wake up the next morning. I wouldn't have hurt myself but didn't care if I died. All of that started because of that huge lifestyle change. Being told I am diabetic, the shots, pricking my fingers 4 to 6 times a day, the diet...oh, that diet, and the expense of it all. Let's face it WhyNot, Quitting smoking is a HUGE lifestyle change too. If you were like me, smoking was one of those "me" things. You know, one of those things that I had just for myself. And when I quit, I really did feel like I was losing a dear companion. I know better than that but I did feel that way never the less. Any huge upset in your lifestyle or routine can trigger depression. I know how you feel about taking medicine. I've felt that way too but you know what? When the depression hung on to me and I couldn't shake it off, I decided I'd give medicine a whirl. I couldn't get myself to fight hard enough to pull out of the depression on my own. And being on medicine is better than being in that deep, dark, black hole. I'm not on medication now for depression. I was only on it for a few months and it did help me. Lexapro is the medication I took. It gave me leg up and then, I fought like hell. I kept myself busy and I accepted that I'm diabetic. Weird thing is, since I quit smoking, my anxiety has returned. I don't mean just tension. I mean those slap you in the face anxiety attacks with shortness of breath, rapid heart rate, hot and sweaty, tightness in the chest, and bordering panic. This Quit thing
17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Looky there, looky there....we're finishing up Heck Week. I've been doing the same thing. I've been reading post and expecting to find this specific day into the quit where everything comes up roses. LOL LOL I reckon NOOOOTTTT!! :confuse: Actually, since I've increased on my water again and laid off caffeine, the last two days have been much better. Today was really good. I am concerned about all of the posts I'm reading on people getting depressed and having trouble with anxiety. Are you reading those? Man, there's a lot of them. I know what anxiety feels like and I've felt a little bit of depression a few years back so I really feel for those people. I wish your day had been really good. I sure wish your husband would stop smoking around you. Just think, a few more days until you go to the doctor and I just know you'll get a good report. Will your husband go with you? One way or another, you need to get your doctor write something up so that your husband takes the smokes either into another room or outside. Your doctor will make him realize that he has to do this for YOUR HEALTH. Don't you think? Just think too, it won't be long and it'll be warm enough to open up the windows and you'll feel like doing some spring cleaning to get rid of the smoke smell. It'll feel so good to get some air circulating throughout the house. I hope you have a good day tomorrow. I've been worried about you all day. I sort of thought you were having a tough day because I haven't seen you post anything. Posting and reading posts really helps. Hang In There With Me!!! We CAN Do This!! Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 14 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 669 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $42 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 13 [B]Mins:[/B] 53 [B]Seconds:[/B] 33
17 years ago 0 932 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Good Morning Terri, I had a pretty good day yesterday too. This morning, I got slapped around some with a few cravings but they're gone now. I drank a whole bunch of water. Are you still drinking that water? Tell the truth now. ;) I'll be honest, I got soooo sick of water that I wasn't drinking as much as I need to. I started doing worse too, huh. :blush: Yesterday, I started really drinking more water again and had a good day. I plan to drink a lot of water today as well. I'm sick of it but, it does help. Girl, have you been reading posts? Have you noticed all the ones that mention that 3 week slump, then the 30 day slump, 60 day slump, 90 day slump, and even slumps at the year mark!!!??!! I want to see all of those times when there isn't a slump. ha ha ha Good Lord. Have a great day and keep hanging in there with me. Tutti [B]My Milage:[/B] [B]My Quit Date: [/B] 2/18/2007 [B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 14 [B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 649 [B]Amount Saved:[/B] $42 [B]Life Gained:[/B] [B]Days:[/B] 1 [B]Hrs:[/B] 12 [B]Mins:[/B] 41 [B]Seconds:[/B] 12

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