Oh Mary - my heart goes out to you as I hear the fear and the ambivalence in your voice. I am similar age (well - i am denying the extra eight years :) ) and i sooo remember myself a year and a half ago as I contemplated quitting. I knew that I needed to, but I really didn't want to, but I knew it was stupid, but it was like giving up my best friend, but I was scared I would be diagnosed with some life ending smoke relateed disease, but I had mental lists of why I wouldn't, but I loved smoking, but I knew I wasn't strong enough to do it, but I really had to, but I had tried and failed before, but I hated myself when I stopped because I turned into such a blubbering cranky person, but I hated myself for being a smoker, etc etc etc etc. The ambivalence and the fears and the "buts" went on and on. [email=http://www.stopsmokingcenter.net/support/viewmessages.aspx?topic=23658&forum=1]Click here if you want to read my story[/email]
Here I am more than a year and a half later to tell you that this is possible. Not only is it possible, it is wonderful. The freedom from addiction is something else, and now I wonder what in the heck took me so long.
Having this site and the people here made all the difference. They taught me about addiction and withdrawal and rewards and support and symptoms and a whole myriad of stuff. Best wishes in this journey. It is bumpy, but boy it is fabulous.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 4/15/2005
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 641
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 16,043
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $2243.5
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 90 [B]Hrs:[/B] 11 [B]Mins:[/B] 10 [B]Seconds:[/B] 48
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Quit Meter
$794,990.00
Amount Saved
-
Quit Meter
Days: 5684
Hours: 13
Minutes: 25
Seconds: 23
Life Gained
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Quit Meter
45428
Smoke Free Days
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Quit Meter
1,135,700
Cigarettes Not Smoked