Today was by far the worst day of my quit. I pray I don't see any more of those days, but I fear I will, maybe even worse ones? After crying for hours, because I simply didn't know what to do with myself, other than pace the floor (I have gotten SO good at this too) Nothing seemed right/normal for me and I just felt like I was trying to be someone that I wasn't. And I'll be honest. I wanted that cigarette in a BAD way, and during this time, I would have smoked if I had had one. My husband gave me some support as we talked about it, but still, I was like, these awful feelings are NEVER going to go away! I wonder how much longer I can stand to feel like this? I got to one point where I grabbed a glass of wine out of my desperate situation. (I don't usually drink) I DID start to feel somewhat calmer for awhile afterwards though. But my feelings, emotions, stress, and worries, are "up there". I can think of a concern and "Boom", it kicks in and I can't bring the feelings down to a more normal level. I am worried...I know smoking won't help whatever situations, but at least I might feel a little more in control of myself, and yes, maybe even a little more at ease. I just want the "crazies" to go away. I've had enough. I can't take much more. I don't know what to do at this point, because today, I have seen only the negative side of this quit. I don't know how much fight I have left in me.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 7/17/2006
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 6
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 49
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $22.5
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 0 [B]Hrs:[/B] 15 [B]Mins:[/B] 28 [B]Seconds:[/B] 54
