Breaking Free....
ME! ME! ME! Oh have I ever been where you are right now! You couldn't find any posts about others feeling the way you do right now? I have probably at least 50 of them myself. It is part of the breaking free process and yes it does suck. Yes, I did feel I would lose my mind. Yes, I hated everyone and everything, most of all MYSELF. What an idiot I had been and to face my stupidity head on was awful. The realization of what I had done to myself and the mistakes I had made along the way was almost more than I could bare. I was Angry. I was depressed. I didn't want to hear it will get better. I just wanted someone to speed that fricken meter up to the point of where it was better and let me take it from there.
I know EXACTLY how you feel. Your post just brought back so many hard memories. Work through it one step at a time. Put your attitude in check. Reach deep inside of you and pull out every bit of courage and strength you can get your hands on because that is what it takes to survive this quit. It is probably the hardest thing you will ever do in your entire life! I gave birth to three children, one completely natural with no drugs, and that was much easier than quitting smoking.
The reward of being free of the enslavement of smoking is worth it Breakfree. I promise you, the freedom is worth every single bit of agony you are going through right now. It cannot be described. You have to experience it for yourself. I always say that quitting smoking is a soul searching, life changing process. Keep going. Yell, scream, kick, fight, break dishes, whatever it takes, just don't smoke. One step at a time using N.O.P.E. That is how we all quit.
[B]My Milage:[/B]
[B]My Quit Date: [/B] 7/1/2005
[B]Smoke-Free Days:[/B] 339
[B]Cigarettes Not Smoked:[/B] 6,798
[B]Amount Saved:[/B] $1186.5
[B]Life Gained:[/B]
[B]Days:[/B] 29 [B]Hrs:[/B] 22 [B]Mins:[/B] 56 [B]Seconds:[/B] 28