Hello Dunner,
First, I want to say I agree with Ashley 100% What she said is so true!
Second, I understand going to bed after a pretty good day and waking up sad and feeling low. I have had that too.
As for mood going south for no reason. I experience that too! The way I see it though is that at least I have good days now. There was a time where I had none, I had all bad days. But that is me! Now I cherish the good days and deal with the bad and feel happy I had the good ones! I can get over this and so can you! I definitely feel better then I used to and if I can do it, you can do it too!
As for being angry to have to get up, ditto, have had that too!
As for anti-depressants, I tried many and none worked for me really till the one I started taking this year. But I know it is possible to get better without meds as I had done it before this relapse. But I havenèt had an anti-depressant work at first then stop (not yet anyway) since none worked till now.
I have taken a mood stabilizer with an anti-depressant before. It did not help me. But that is just me. We are all different and need to find what works for us. All I can say is if you feel the need give it a try with the help of your psych doc and see! It might help!
As for your psych doc, tell her everything you know or feel or whatever symptoms you have. Even if you feel like you are whining. You are NOT whining. You are giving her importnat and valuable information that she needs to help you! And btw, I like to adress issues too so I get it!
As for thinking in circles and making yourself confused, been there done that. This site and the program really helps for that, how to deal with your thoughts!
I wish, I had really great advice for you. all I can say is I understand you! And the only advice I have is seek help. post here often and work the program it is really good! Hang in there, this too shall pass!