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My marriage is in crisis...

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

Hi Diva,

Started to reply this morning, but I'm not so together right now and it wasn't going right. I hope that you and your husband are successful with your plan. You deserve to be in a better relationship. I wish I had more to write but your situation is too close to mine right now and I am not even able to articulate about my own. I just don't feel like I'm in a position to give any advice or opinions. Please know that I support you and that you are in my thoughts and prayers

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1693

Good luck Diva!

Let us know how it goes

Breanne, Bilingual Health Educator

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hi guys,

Thanks for your replies! I really needed to hear this. I keep thinking I am being unreasonable and unflexible! I just can't help it! But I hear what you are saying! I need to be happy too. I want us to both be happy.

As for doing something for myself. I am going to yoga tonight. Wish me luck!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1153

Diva, I'm happy to hear that you came up with a plan. Stick to your guns. Remember that a relationship involves two people and it must be good for both parties - not just one! If you need something for the relationship that you're not getting, you need to find a way to get it. Stick to your guns, compromise, but make sure that you are comfortable and happy with the compromise. This is your relationship too, you should be happy in it.

Brenna, Bilingual Health Educator

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 185

Hi diva! It is normal to feel moody after such rough hours! I thing you should try to do something for you. Get out for a walk s.o.

Hang in there!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 142

diva, no need to apologize here for being moody! or exhausted! after 9 or so hours of arguing i would sleep for 18! sticking to your guns is a good idea, hope everything works out for you, you deserve it!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hey Goofy,

Thank you for your kind and caring reply! I so apreciate it!

Well, boy am I all over the place today. Phew! Up and down, up and down...I am so exhausted. I had a long exhausting fight with my husband. It started around 4-5 pm and ended at 2 am...

Tonight, at one point, I suggested the beginning of a solution to my husband. I stuck to my guns and he agreeed. Well I did compromise while sticking to my guns but I think compromise is necessary. Now that we agreed on a little plan, we will see what happens.

I decided I was tired of just feeling lame and just being sad. So I found the beginning of a plan. Now, I fully intend to put in the effort to make it work. Question is will he. But I have 0, and I mean NO control over that. If he does, I think it will help and in the long run we will be ok. If he doesn't well at least I will have tried and I will have done my best and I will know where we stand! So here is to hoping and to trying to be proactive! and here is to challenging those thoughts!

Sorry if I am all moody today and all over the place. Don't know what is in to me! But to those of you who bother readin this sorry and thank you!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

I messed up again and we are "fighting" again. Except we aren't fighting as he is watching t.v. I feel like I am going mad. I can't do anything right. I can't even apologize right it semms. I am so lame. I am so tired. I know I need to challenge these thoughts. I just feel trapped at the moment. And lame. I feel so lame and bad and desperate...I hate myself...

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 3043

Diva, I don't have any answers for you. I don't know that I could pretend everything is okay if it is not. However, I do want to reassure you that I don't have a problem with you coming on here and venting and not having time to reply. I am glad that we are here for you. We all vent and sometimes just don't or can't carry on to answer. You owe us no apology. You express yourself well and you are not defective.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 538

Hey guys,

Sorry for coming on here and venting and not answering anyone. I don't have the computer for very long. My laptop is still not back and I had to borrow hubby's PC. As such I have very little time. I still feel bad though, so sorry.

Been fighting with hubby. My fault. Had a chance to have fun with him but ruined it by wanting to talk to him. Why am I like a dog with a bone. He can ignore the bad stuff and just relax and have fun. But I can't. When things are not going well with us I need to talk and try to fix things. Of course it always turns out badly and we fight. We can't seem to communicate.

I feel defective.

I feel defective that I can't communicate with him ever. I always say the wrong thing and he shuts down.I should have just tried harder to pretend nothing was wrong and I should have just tried to have a fun evening. Why am I incapable of pretending? Am I just broken? He does it so easily and I can't. So now he is over in the living room and I am in here completely miserable. He wants time alone. So once again I am alone and miserable because I can't relax and just act like things are fine...

We can't talk. We just fight. Don't know what ever made me think I could go into counselling and help people. I can't even communicate effectively with my own husband. I feel sad and lame and anxious.

Sorry again for just dropping in and venting. I will do better tomorrow. Hugs to you all and thanks for being here.

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