I find the general anxiety and thinking I'm dying (my fear is heart problems) worse than panic attacks. I wish to GOD my anxiety was situational (ie driving, small spaces). I think I could deal with those things better than I'm dealing with my general and health anxiety.
I try to keep myself occupied. Exercise, yoga, reading...I've even recently bought an adult colouring book. Some days are okay....other days (like today) are not.
While the weather (at the moment) isn't too great, I want to wish everyone a Happy Canada Day.
Today also happens to be my first day of vacation....and I'm doing very little today. I just got back from the farmers market with 4 quarts of strawberries and some homemade pecan butter tarts. I'm now planning on curling up on the couch, with a warm blanket, my heating pad, a good book and soft classical music playing in the background. Later this afternoon I will do some exercise on my elliptical machine...and after dinner I plan on making strawberry jam. May or may not see some fireworks tonight...weather pending.
I hope my fellow Canadians are enjoying this glorious holiday (although it's right in the middle of the week so it seems rather odd).
I completely understand what you are dealing with.
In Jan & Nov 2014 my anxiety forced me to go on sick leave from work.
It was not something I wanted to do. I felt very guilty. I felt I was letting my co-workers down. There wasn't really anyone to cover for me. I also felt my co-workers would think I was "faking it" (even though I know they don't think that....at that time I had taken a total of maybe 4 or 5 sick days in the 8 years I worked there).
You need to what is best for you....regardless of what your boss or co-workers say/think. Good luck in making your decision.
First off....you are definitely worth it. Please don't ever think that you are not.
Perhaps you could phrase your request to your husband a bit differently. Perhaps the word "meditate" put him off. You could let him know your feeling anxious, and ask him to sit with you for a few minutes while you practice some deep breathing. He wouldn't have to do anything or participate if he didn't want....but he could at least support you by just being there.
Yes....anxiety, panic and depression suck. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.
I am so sick and tired of feeling like crap every day, and worrying/assuming everything I feel is related to my heart. I don't know when the last time was that I felt good or normal. I just want it to all go away. I'm not "living" like this. I go through the motions but I have no joy or desire in my life (except the desire to feel better). .
Can't seem to win. I have chest pain which causes me anxiety. Then, when I'm feeling not too bad, I have anxiety because I don't have chest pain. This is so frustrating.
I'm already on meds (Zoloft & Lyrica...and have already tried Cipralex, Effexor and Celexa). While they control the physical symptoms of my anxiety (palpitations, nausea, etc), they don't really help with the mental aspect.
Alas...I have a drs apt tomorrow...so we'll go from there.
Feeling a bit better anxiety wise the last couple of days. Still have chest pain. Saw Dr and decided to stop Lyrica as I didn't feel it was helping much. Got a call from CAMH for assessment...but not til November.
I'm pretty sure I know what a couple of my triggers are. Not sure which is the bigger issue though.
One is my job. I deal all day long with people with chest pain and other potential heart problems. The problem is that I see all the things that can go wrong...and when I see something that goes outside the "norm" it tends to set me off more. For example...last week I did a stress test on a 40 year old man with chest pain. The test was very abnormal and the patient went for an angiogram the next day, and ended up needing (and having) bypass surgery a few days later. It's unusual for a 40 year old man to have such a sick heart. My mind takes off with irrational thoughts...I'm 35 years old (which is close to 40)...that could be me. I really like my job, and don't want to give it up...so I'm going to have to find a way to deal with this.
Number 2 is my family history...both sides. My maternal grandfather had a stroke. My dad's family has all had heart problems. My grandfather and uncle both died suddenly of heart attacks, and my other uncle also had a heart attack and bypass surgery. When my uncle died in August 2015, it really hit me hard. My dad and my uncle look VERY similar (so similar that at the funeral many people did double takes). All I could see/think was...this is what it will look like when my dad dies. I had my dad get some cardiac tests just after my uncle died, and everything was fine....but it still unsettles me. I know that's not something I can control (eg not like controlling high blood pressure or diabetes which can lead to heart problems).
Anyway...I just keep trying to work through things. Sigh.
Jury duty is something I've never had to do. Got called in my hometown when I was away at university, so was excused. I wont say have fun...as I'm sure it wont be.
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