I am currently experiencing a setback. For me I find that relapses are one of the worst parts of anxiety/panic. You feel good for a while and think you are making progress and then BAM the symptoms recur. I am trying to do relaxation techniques and remind myself that this is just a phase and will pass... Nonetheless it is really upsetting but just a fact I have to learn to accept and deal with.
I have a fear of having my blood pressure taken and going to the doctors. I have reached the section on exposure work and I have a dilemma. In the past I used to take my blood pressure whenever I felt stressed out or anxious. This was my checking behaviour because it gave me some relief if it was within normal limits. However if it was high it would make me more anxious. I have tried taking my blood pressure repeatedly until I was tired of it and the anxiety around taking my blood pressure subsided. However when I stopped taking it I developed anxiety because of the uncertainty of not knowing what it was. I somehow need to reach a balance where it can be taken without fear but I also cant obsess about it. Does anyone have any ideas how to tackle this?
My doctor has told me I have white coat hypertension because everytime I went in there it was significantly high. Usually 150-90 He sent me for the 24hr blood pressure test which revealed mild daytime elevation. It did not help that everytime the cuff would inflate I would nearly have a panic attack! My doctor told me he is not concerned but treated me with medication and asked me to check it at home because the office readings are not a true reflection This is kind of wear my obsession began!
Whenever I check it at home the first reading sometimes is elevated because I am anxious and then all subsequent readings are normal. As for what scares me about not knowing my blood pressure is I feel like its something that I am in control of and that my frequent anxiety and stress episodes are causing damage to my heart/cardiovascular system and may cause a stroke or other complications in the future. And I feel that it would be my fault due to the inability to control my stress/anxiety.
I have tried not taking it for a month and it did relieve some of the obsessive thinking everyday. However when I did go to take it again the anxiety level was much higher than when I took it every day. So im kinda in a pickle either way! I guess I should focus on my underlying thoughts that are leading me to be anxious when its being taken. How do you go about reducing anxiety about going to the doctors office. You can not really do exposure work because I only have an appointment once every six months and its not frequent enough to unlearn the fear.
Thank you for the advice. I will try to replace my negative thoughts with positive ones and see how that works! Im sure it will take a while trying to reverse years of negative thinking but it will be worth it in the end!
I have tried repeatedly taking my blood pressure several times and every reading after the initial one is normal. I have tried this over an extended period such as everyday for a week. The problem is that I begin to obsess about it and I feel like I have to know what it is. Then if I am unable to take it the uncertainty makes me extremely anxious.
So I built up the nerve to go to my doctors yesterday for my biannual prescription refill. I went a month earlier than I had to because the anticipation and anxiety has been slowly building as my remaining month of pills was running out.
I started the morning with positive thinking and challenging my negative thoughts. As I drove to the office the anxiety began... I arrived at the office and while I sat in the waiting room I was able to do breathing exercises and the palpitation subsided. However when I was called in the office my heart felt as if it was going to beat out of my chest. I tried to tell myself this is the same feeling I experience when I work out nearly on a daily basis. My doctor was in to see me in just a few short minutes. I requested that he not take my blood pressure. His response was "sure I know your normally anxious so it will probably be high." He refilled my prescriptions and I left.
As I drove home I felt absolutely defeated as this was the first time I avoided this situation. I did feel relieved that I was not told that my blood pressure was high. I now fear that this may be the new norm and I will not be able to have it taken again. Today I am still trying to accept the fact that I avoided the situation and move on from this.
I also have a prescription for Ativan 1mg sublingual. I have had the prescription for several years now and like yourself I take it as a last resort when my calming techniques have failed. To date I have had no ill effects from it and find it is good for me in the type of situation mentioned previously. As davit mentioned everybody responds differently to medication so only you will know how you react to it and with consultation with your physician can determine whether it is a right choice for you.
If you take Ativan or any benzodiazepine (valium, xanax to name a few) frequently you develop a tolerance to it and will require an increase in dose to receive the same therapeutic effect. Through occasional use as you mention this is less likely to occur!
Keep fighting the good fight! Everyone is here to support you ;-)
I started seeing a psychologist this week who specializes in CBT and anxiety disorders. I really like her and she has given me hope that there is an end to this tunnel! She started with teaching me how to do breathing exercises properly and stressing that I need to practice them everyday for two 20minutes sessions when possible. She said it is quite likely that I have been suffering from anxiety for so long that my body does not know how to relax.
I have done breathing exercises prior to seeking a therapist but I use to only do them when I felt anxious. I have been following her advice and doing them everyday whether I am feeling relaxed or anxious and already am noticing a reduction in my overall stress levels.
Just thought I would share. For the first time in a long time I feel as if I am going in the right direction
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