I was reading your post and the new mod topic for today and now I get it. The key is working on one negative core belief or assumption at a time. Now I just have to pick one and keep at it. Thanks Davit for pointing this out. Sometimes it is hard to see the forest through the trees without a little help and a push in the right direction. Also what you said about the fight or flight is so true. One day I will be able to recognize when it is not needed and just shut it off. Knowing this will help me see it for what it is and enable me to control it and have so control of myself and my emotions. I will be in control and not the panic. You are really very insightful Davit and I appreciate your help.
Bang on. Some would say why paint your house if it doesn't need it, but if it is the wrong colour and it is bothering you, then you have to paint it, no matter how hard, but remember you can do it one wall at a time. Some see it as too big of a project so just keep right on the way it is even though they don't like it. If it wasn't hard we would probably have done it long time ago. Sort out the negative core beliefs and even if you can't change them, knowing they are there is a start on doing just that, changing them.
Fight or flight is normal and necessary, not being able to shut it off when it is not needed is the problem. You are slowly solving the problem, but you are solving it and one day it will be gone. Soon you will be able to panic and let it go and laugh at the situation. Like dominoes once you beat one situation the rest just fall in line. It is the same technique for all of them.
My core beliefs have had a major effect on my life. They say learn from your mistakes? I am trying to do that and change my negative core beliefs at the same time. I find that very hard to do, when my past experience tells me that my core belief are true and valid. This causes a lot of conflict when trying to change them. Then comes the anxiety and the fight or flight response which to me is a normal and natural response, a natural way of being. Because this is what I have done for most of my life.
Here are two tips that will help you better understand your assumptions and core beliefs:
Identify the events linked to the start of your sadness or depression:
Another important way to uncover your negative core beliefs is to think about what was going on in your life around the first time you were experienced a long period of sadness or depression. One thing you can look for is a match between what happened in that situation and what your specific assumptions and core beliefs are.
However, remember that no matter who you are, it’s important to look at both your needs in relationships and your needs for success & enjoyment in other parts of your life.
Examine your childhood experiences:
In general, the strongest core beliefs and assumptions develop earliest in life from interactions with parents and other caregivers. They also develop more from interactions with school peers and friends. Your history of adolescent and adult romantic relationships is also something you should consider because they could contribute to the development of some of your beliefs about yourself and others.
How do you think your past has affected your present?
It’s been a while since you were active on this site. Please extend your session below
You have been logged out due to inactivity.
Please sign back in.
We use cookies to help us learn about how our platform is used and how we can improve your experience. To
learn more please see our Privacy Policy and Terms of Use.
