Good morning everyone: I've been on this site before but stopped for awhile during the holiday season. I want to share my latest news. My friend who had lung cancer died in late October. I had helped her with driving to and from radiation, chemo appts. etc. I would call her every morning to see how she was doing. I'm still grieving I think and that's o.k. Now, just about three wks. ago another close friend died, quite suddenly, in the middle of the night. She was someone who really looked after herself. She walked every day, ate healthily, etc. It was a shock! Now I can recognize I'm feeling a bit depressed. I don't feel like doing anything, certainly not going out to walk in this cold weather especially if it is windy as it affects my breathing, asthma. Anyway, I do walk but only a couple of blocks, not every day, every three days or so. I don't seem to have interest in anything right now, though I still do things. I don't really care. I know this is the grieving and depression and hoping it won't last too long. I didn't want to share this, but realize this is exactly what needs to be shared with others. I wish I could see you face-to-face and have a group discussion. I haven't had any panic attacks, but the stress has brought acid reflux back sometimes and sleepless nights - and the crappy chest pains, which I hate the most. I still take care of myself and eat well enough, it's just that I feel a bit like a zombie I guess. Still doing my volunteer stuff - and I just started crying now which is probably good for me as I don't cry easily - you know, stiff upper lip and all that. So bye for now.