Hiya Dolphin,
I agree with Josie,It was scary but you did it. You went and got your lunch and came back. You should be proud of yourself. Be kind and patient with yourself and remember every step counts :)
-Diva
dolphin,
You made it! I know it was pretty scary but this was a big step. Use your exposure therapy to help assist in combatting those heavy feelings and keep pushing through until you conquer this :)
Josie, Health Educator
sooo .... for the last few days I have been feeling ok - dare I say "better" but I blew it today ...
I thought I was ok to walk 1 block by myself to get lunch today (I never go by myself) .. I managed to get where I was going but felt really nervous when I got there .. the entire walk there I kept argueing with my OCD "voices" ... "what if I pass out on the way? will someone find me?.. what if - what if?" ... I got my lunch and headed back to work, but on the way back it got worse - I felt like I could black out at any moment - almost like I was losing control - I was soo scared and tried to walk as fast as I could - I kept thinking "if I can just get back in front of work - I know someone would see me if I passed out" - my heart was racing and I felt like I could not breathe ... but I made it back! ... I was sooo dissapointed in myself that I just cried when I got back to my desk ..... it just seems like it will not go and stay away and it is always on my mind ...
sorry to ramble but this site always makes me feel better when I read it and I just needed to vent today! ... this is my 2nd PA this week at work (down from the usual 5) ... the 1st was Monday in the ladies room (another place I hate to go by myself - as pitiful as that is) ... I flet trapped in the stall and had to run out as fast as I could and get near people that I knew ..... I feel like such a dork everytime this happens ....lol!!
Thanks for listening!!
:)
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