Thanks for the welcome Danielle, Gal. Gal, not sure I'd say I'm coping with it particularly well, more I've become accustomed to living with it through time and necessity! It took me four years to go see a doctor which was very silly, in that time the behavior became so ingrained it's much harder to now break it. When the anxiety first started I was unable to easily leave the house, or get on public transport and go to work. I had to buy a bike to travel on my own. One of hundreds of changes it introduced to my life and routine. Gradually my horizons have broadened simply because they have had to. I couldn't have survived without an income so ceasing to function at all has never been an option. Whilst this brings regular discomfort I've just had to put up with it and have tried not to stop doing things I want to do in life, even if I end up doing them in slightly eccentric manner because of the panic disorder! It does get a little easier when the severe attacks become less frequent but the constant presence of anxious thoughts is a pain and so all-consuming! I guess I'm seven years into this now so know it's ins and outs inside my head intimately. It's almost like another, independent voice and thought process within my brain. Usually, I win, but there's always a battle of some sort, which is exhausting. The upside to that is you can regularly celebrate victory! In my case they've been lonely victories as I've not told friends or family about this, only my doctor. That's also probably been a silly decision, but in my case I guess I don't want others to make allowances for my condition, I want to live on "normal" terms and am determined to beat it on my own. Anyways, with my particular flavor of anxiety I guess it was a case of starting with a very small, restrictive comfort zone and then gradually expanding that outwards. When you've established that you can do x, or go as far as y, or last as long as z, stick that down as a marker in your head and stay within it until you are comfortable with the new limit. Then work out where you can extend it, easy stuff at first so you don't produce severe attacks - these certainly knock me back and can wreck a new boundary, so I suppose it's a case of "baby steps"! Nowadays, thankfully, sever

WELCOME PATRICK!!!! WOW!! I envy you sounds like you are taking this anxiety and panic and facing it so well!!! I myself am pretty much house bound maybe you could give me some ideas on how you have faced this? I give in to it and hate the thought of having another attack and will do anything to avoid them.(hence why i am home bound)I have done some CBT before for a few months and i didnt seem to get very far with it so i stopped going maybe i should start to go again! Thank you so much for your story makes me want to take another look at all this and try again!!! ALWAYS SMILE!!! Gal

Patrick, Thank you for sharing your story with us and welcome to the Panic Center! It sounds like you already have a great knowledge base concerning your panic. Our program will help you take it one step further and hopefully this will help gain greater control. You need to start challenging those thoughts when clock watching. Members will be along shortly to welcome you. If ever you'd like to connect to them instantly, simply download our IM. If you have any questions or would like some feedback, we are only a few clicks away and always happy to help. Keep us posted! Danielle _______________________________ The Panic Center Support Team

Hi everyone, Ive just registered on this site today, mainly to follow the self-help course, and thought Id drop in an introduction. Apologies, it was just supposed to be short but appears to have turned into an essay! Ive had panic disorder since 1998. It just hit me out of the blue one day on a crowded bus without warning, bam. That was seven years ago now. From my un-medically educated perspective, I put this down to a period of a month or two immediately prior where I was working two jobs and getting very little sleep, which I seem to require a lot of. Low serotonin is my own favoured self-diagnosis as the initiator (otherwise my life was just great!) but it really could have been anything, and I shan't dwell on medical matters I know nothing about! I can get extreme panic that takes the form of fear of losing control of my body and social embarrassment nearly always this is a desire to get to a restroom, but if Ive recently been and know - even through the anxiety - that it cannot be a necessity, it can take other forms such as nausea. Its a clever and cruel affliction! Like many I initially cast around for a physical explanation, which would most certainly have made me feel better, but it turned out to be panic disorder. It's never entirely gone away since, which is why I'm interested in this online group/programme. I have had CBT sessions, which were extremely useful (it's a shame I put it with it for so long - four or five years - before seeking help, chalk that up to embarrassment), but still have a certain "background" level of anxiety, which I'm finding very hard to shift. I may try and arrange more CBT for myself later in the year but will try this first! The panic disorder has not really changed my life to any great degree in terms of what I can do and achieve, for which I should be thankful, but it has certainly made it extremely uncomfortable on a regular basis. I have had to modify my behaviour and routine avoidance through timing, in the main, of unexpected situations and crowded public spaces - especially if they are to occur over an unspecified length of time. Since the CBT - which I finished too early first time around, without a doubt - too wrapped up in the early successes, these attacks have toned down quite a lo