Hi to eveyone!!!
Coco, sorry to hear about your 'misstep' on Academy night but don't beat yourself up over it. Try and learn from it. It is very hard to be around alcohol without partaking. It is just natural to join in on the fun. But you can have fun too being sober. I am finding that true, one baby step at a time. I have not had people over to the house for dinner parties since I quit drinking. I am not sure I am ready for it. And if that is the case, as it seems to be, better safe than sorry. I am OK dining out at restaurants with drinks available. So that, in itself, is a big step for me. I can't hide out from alcohol. But I am in control of the situations I put myself in. If I did not feel confident, I just wouldn't go. That is the bottom line.
I had a very long day at school yesterday,,,10 to 8 and then come home to my husband telling me that the land surveryors were here and the green space and trees and the peace and quiet we have now will not
be there in a short time. They are developing to the south and east of us. That news, along with a long and tiresome day at school, made me want to just get back in my car and buy a bottle of wine and drink.
They say at AA, HALT is a trigger. Hungry, Angry, Lonely, and Tired.
I felt all of those. Well, fortunately, my real brain kicked in and said that is STUPID to go out at 8:30 and start drinking.
I slept OK last nite, but woke up way too early today and I am not in a much better mood than I was going to bed. I have said my prayers and done some reading and now I need to find the resolve in me to get out of this funk. I have many things to do today and drinking was not on my to-do list. I hope I don't add it!!!! I am 58 days sober and will be talking to my higher power alot today, I'm afraid. As long as it works, I am fine with that. As I read this, I really believe I need to change my attitude to a more positive one. I am just too negative and it is too early in the day to be that negative.
So, Sober is good for me. Sober is good for me. Sober is good for me. Please God help me today as you have never helped me before! I need strength, guidance, acceptance, patience and diversion today.
Everyone who reads this maybe can give me a thoughtful kick in the butt, and ho