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Posts created by agua

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

Struggling with worry thoughts.

I learned something on meditation classes, that we can not talk to our mind using phrases like yours "stop the thought", is an authoritarion way to speak. We don´t like people talk to us in bad manners, our mind is the same. You have to talk gentle with yourself. I think is a good time to take note off all these thoughts to solve them later, or in another day.

One thing that completely change my state of mind to the good way is dancing classes like salsa, kizomba. It´s impossible to practise dancing classes with a problem in our head, it´s not imediatly but after may be 20 minuts my mind are fully relaxed and with all problems forgoted.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

Struggling with worry thoughts.

My worst panic attack in this year, was when I became angry with my anxious thoughts, I was fighting and angry with myself like "you won´t beat me" "this time I won´t let having a panick attack", I was talking in not gentle manners. It worked for a while, I was surprised and happy. But it was not a good ideia, because after a while the anxious thoughts come back so so strong, with no control, that I learned not to do anymore again. Now, when I´m anxious, I speak to me like, "it´s ok to have a panic attack, it´s normal for me, I´m used, but I´m working on this and I know that little by little in time, I will be good.""I´m becaming for calm now" And I remember always that this programm exists and it´s working for me.

I would like to try also smiling to the mirror, it seams it would be funny to try :)

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

Struggling with worry thoughts.

I forgot to tell that I think it´s not good to overwhelm an anxious thought, the better is to let go and wait for it to pass, because we know sooner or later it will pass. One example meditation give to me is that how our thoughts work: if we try to push down a ball in water, when we leave the ball, it will rise up much stronger.
Other similar example I recently read how our brains work (including who don´t have this problem we have): if I tell you " don´t think in clouds". What you are think right away? "In clouds". Our brain don´t read the word "don´t", it will skip to "think in clouds". That´s why it´s useless when we have panic attacks say to ourselves "don´t be nervous" , or like yours "stop the thought" don´t work. And when you tell "you are better than this" you are being depreciative with your self.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

Struggling with worry thoughts.

Repetition is good but only for "alternative thoughts" and "Challenge statement" that we learn on our Challenge worsheet.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

Struggling with worry thoughts.

I can say for 20 years "I will not have any more panick attacks" that doens´t become true just because we repet it. "Something less than 100% true is not true"

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

Having short conversations with people

When I´m with new people that I see for a short periods of time (like at the gym time, dance classes, etc...) I´m not able to develop a short conversation about irrelevant issues like people normally do. I can not concentrate, I get with my thoughts paralised. I like very much to be with this persons but I become embarrased because I don´t speake practically nothing.

Next, when I´m alone, I become very sad with me, because I could not interact with that person. That problem let me unable to develop new friendships, so I´m a very alone person.

I tryed to exposure myself with more social events, because I know is lack of practise. But I can see the same person 100 times, and I continue not interacting. I still haven´t finded yet the key to unblock that problem.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

Struggling with worry thoughts.

Davit, may be you should give to you some little rewards to make up for the long day you will have. Something you like and that conforts you.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

Eye contact on a simple walk

Since puberty, when increased self-awareness, I started to having anxious feelings when a person cross eye contact on a simple walk on a street with me. I Become with muscle tension, heart pressure everytime I have to look on the eyes of a stranger (all kind if people). This happens all the time with a simple walk, were I have not to start any conversation. I know people look just because we are in the same street path. This is very unpleasent and don´t allow me to joy a simple activity like this.

I tryed to challenge this anxious thought (feeling observated), but couldn´find and answer that allow me to relax at the moment.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

Having short conversations with people

Hi, I already did for years your suggestions, and I think I became an expert. I can camuflage my problem, and start a short talk. A lot of times I ask questions, to keep the conversation in the other side.

But after years and years doing that, I get to conclusion, that is too tiring to do it, since I´m doing theater with people and don´t get any joy doing it. And I´m not being spontaneous.

These days, I´m trying to relax and have a conversation only if I´m feeling not anxious. I think is better to accept the way I am, because I wan´t to have joy talking to people, even if it is 3 seconds of conversation. Although I know the risks I´m taking, because people could ask "why this person talk so little?"

I wan´t to discover a way to relax and create empathy with persons, as a starting point, but not making theater. So that I can gradually be more confidante, can be myself. At first, I hope people accept me as a person who don´t like to talk too much, I take more time to trust people, I don´t know why.

9 years ago 0 +0 / -0 60

CBT process like a study of character (like actors job)

I am struggling with exposure plan for a week, having dificcult in divide my goals in small goals. Because they parently seam not possible to divide. But today finally I could create small goals to achieve the main goal. And I was very surprising for me.

In this afternoon I was viewing an interview of an actor, and he was talking about their work. Suddently I thought "wait, this is what I´m doing with me, using CBT !" We have to study ourselves has much deep as possible.

If our career were being actors we were studying others peoples personalities in depth. Or if an actor will interpretate us in movie, he was doing an investigation similar to ours. Also sometimes actors have dificult going out of their characters, when they finish a job. They like and enjoy doing their work.

For me this appear to be a new aproach of seeing this treatment process, although the way or reason we arrived here are not very pleasent. But I think we could see CBT not so much related to a problem but related to something that it is interansting also, and hoppely a great experience in our lifes.

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