Thank You all for your responses.
I really do rejoice every day. Rejoice in the fact that I don't smoke any more. Rejoice that I have so much more time to do the things I love. I spend so much less time stewing and contemplating and smoking and plotting and smoking, (man that was such a time robber). I really get to concentrate more on actually doing, rather that the whole thing of standing back and plotting.
Last night I went to a business gathering of about 25 people, all colleauges, I got to be part of the gathering, party all night. I didn't have to sneak out to puff away and then go stealthily wash my hands, brush my teeth and hope that I didn't reak of smoke. I got to be part of a whole conversation from beginning to end. At one point someone asked how long it had been and I replied 85 days and they all clapped and cheered. I was surprised, embarrased, that any one would notice. I was also surprised that another person came to me and quietly said that they had quit and that they were six days in. This person was worried about being bearish and hostile, I hope that I was able to offer enough support. The two of us shared about how tough the first week is and how much easier it gets over time. I hope I was of service to this person, I hope that they will come here. I know for me that the SSC, this 24/7 full time on line group therapy has helped, the support of others has really helped and the care and support that I might be able to give to those new to the journey is a huge help.
What fun it is to be a nonsmoker. I never new that it would be like this. Yes there are all kinds of health concerns. What can I say am a 49 year old male who has been pretty abusive of his body. I would of had these or other concerns very similar, it is a question of age and habit. What I am trying to say is that I would be having all of the issues I have now, or other issues whether I smoked or didn't, just as if I smoke it will not take the issues away or change them. In fact from where I sit in this moment the issues I have would be worse if I smoked.
So why not just go out and fill the garden, wallow in the smell of flashy bulbs and glorious spring blooms. Take the bike and go for a spin by the lake. Do all the things that I didn't do, in fact deprived myself of