Glad to see you are still around here and still wanting to quit. 😊
"I really want this quit to work... what should be be doing to get ready for it??" Learn all you can about what will happen to your body, and your mind, when the nicotine is stopped. As you know it's a terribly addictive chemical. Your mind is going to be doing everything it can to get you cave in and have a cigarette because it "needs it", or so it makes you think it does. I wish there was a special thing, a dodad, whatever, that would work for you, and everybody else that wants to quit. Unfortunately we are all different, just like our fingerprints. What worked for me may or may not work for you.
You do sound like you really really want to quit, and that's a great start. You have to want to succeed for this to work. You will need to change just about all of your daily routines that you have now, because right now, I assume, it all revolves around the cigarette.
Make a plan. I used nicotine replacement therapy to help me in the beginning. I used the patch. The patch helped take care of the physical withdrawal of the nicotine and let me concentrate on the mental part, the hardest part in my opinion.
Pick a day to start. Try to take it just one day, one hour, one minute at a time. Don't think about the future or tomorrow because as you know it's hard to quit. Concentrate on the now. At the beginning it might seem like a hopeless feeling, but that's why you just have to get past each minute each hour. One hour then another hour and soon the days is almost over. Then comes the next day. Do the same thing. Just concentrate on the now and don't think about the future. A long 16 hours later and it's bed time again. Day two is over. On to day three. Again one hour at a time. Pretty soon almost a week is over, and your confidence, hopefully will start to go up. The longer you go without a cigarette the stronger your confidence will become. (I hope) You CAN do this.
You might need to have something to keep your fingers busy at times. A rubber band to play with, a STRESS ball you can squeeze the heck out of, a straw to suck on and pretend it's a cigarette, (Well those helped me) You also may need something to chew on. Gum, vegetables, ice, candy, whatever you like. I carried a pocket full of lifesaver wintergreens.
Try to keep yourself busy. If you don't have time to think about missing a smoke, time will pass quicker. It all goes back to the beginning. Make a plan. You don't want to have to think too much in the beginning because as you know it's hard quitting. If you don't have time to think about smoking it's better for you. Remember EVERYTHING is going to seem different without a cigarette and you have to be stronger than the urges.
Can you list the reasons that you've tried and failed? Are they the same or always different, or a combination of both? Do you see some kind of trend in your failed attempts? Friends, places, emotions, boredom.
A bit of trivia for you. Agricultural tobacco (Nicotiana tabacum) contains high levels of the nicotine used in pesticides. The nicotine alkaloid is produced as a defensive chemical to repel insects that might defoliate or otherwise inflict fatal damage to the plant.
And we want to inhale this SH*T???
Stay safe and strong.