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Synopsis of the program

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Synopsis of the program

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 341

My hubby is very overweight, and I met him online and got to know him before i met him or saw his picture. When I met him I didnt care about his weight and I still dont. I want him to be happy and healthy thats my main thing. He says i'm the thinnest woman he has dated ever. When I met him I ws about quite thin (130 lbs, but i'm 5.7) and he says now I look far better ( but i'm far heavier now) Its also from the meds, and I do eat a lot more than I used to. He says I look healthier now than ever, but I feel huge. My clothes size is way up, more than I would like, but ce la vie. When I see myself in the mirror, I see large, and it worries me. Also being at home for the past 6 months hasnt helped either, but i'm trying to get better at accepting myself again.

I have been working out at home for the last 2 years, and its helped but I Think just going to the gym a few days a week is going to be very good for me and give me more confidence. I used to be quite fit and I felt so good about myself, so I want to try get to that stage again.

Today I walked back from the library, and then binged on two brownies I had left..They tasted good but now i'm kicking myself. !!!!!thanks for your replies :)

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2101

Hello DM,

Wow! quick reply, I hadn't even logged off yet! I get what you mean about weight being a perception thing. I also am trying to be happy with myself from the inside.

And yes, my binges were mostly sugar too! What is it about sugar?!

Thank you and thank you also minnessota for sharing on this topic!

And yes we are all beautiful women!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 313

Diva...OMG you could be writing my story...

I too can remember NOT going out because of how I looked etc... so thank you for sharing.

As for being overweight it really is perception as I see women all the time who I know are a lot larger than me yet I think they are beautiful and look amazing.... yet I can't accept myself for who I am .... It's so hard to explain...

I too know I can work through this as I've put forth a different spin on it this time... That it's not about the number on the scale but about feeling good from within... I think then all else will fall into place.

As for binge eating.. I've done that too... usually sugar binges .... and I tried purging but that wasn't my thing. lol... I just like to consume and it's definately tied to my emotions and ups and downs in my life.

Thanks again Diva!!

We are all beautiful women!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2101

P.S: I know I will get there though! I can do this I know it! I have dealt with other issues and have come on top so I know I can do it. I figure thought challenging can help me here as much as anywhere else!

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 2101

Hello Minn and DM!

First I want to say I think you have both shown yourselves to beautiful, kind supportive people.

Second, I want to say I struggled with that issue too. I have had weight issues, body images issues and a unhealthy relationship to food all of my life. I have been overweight a lot in my life. I eat my emotions and my stress and my sadness... I used to binge eat sometimes. I would not make myself throw itup though...whatever that meant about me lol. I was at one point eating very very little and exercising tons and found myself to be unhealthily underweight. Even then I thought I was fat! Worse part of it all I still remember being told how sexy I was and pretty! I had a BMI of 16.6 at the time how sexy could I have been!I was tired and anxious all the time! But that is our society for you! Now I don't binge, I don't starve myself either. I still manage to eat my emotions though! But I figure I am improving!

I am still overweight but am working on accepting myself the way I am while working hard on exercising and eating just the right amount to be healthy. I am working hard on fixing my relationship to food but mostly with my body and my image.It is hard for me not to go into extremes but I am getting there :) Atm am aiming at getting into a healthy weight while loving myself just the way I am till I get there.

I also have had issues of my hair or clothes not being just right. I remember not going out or missing school because of it! I also have issues with certain body parts on my body. I am working hard on not looking at myself in bits and peices but looking at myself as a whole and seeing my own beauty.

I find this issue difficult though as I have struggled with it for a long time.

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 313

Hi Minn

I completely relate to this topic. I have battled this my whole life... lol..

For me a bit of it has to do with my ocd I think.. like when I was younger I couldn't get my hair "just right"...(the 80's and early 90's..lol)..or my socks not sitting just right... ridiculous but true. And my perception of my body instead of what it really is... I'm 5' tall and have always been very petite but even at 100lbs I was "fat" in my eyes...and now I'm heavier than that after 2 kids and 9 years later...and I'm still "fat" in my eyes...

This is what I'm currently working on though and I'm using The Secret.... that like thoughts attract like things... so negative thoughts about being heavy attract extra pounds... so now I'm using positive self talk...and telling myself I'm just right for me etc. and I have to admit it feels pretty good.

That being said in todays world of marketing and advertising... those pressures to be thin or look a certain way are definately out there whether we believe they affect us or not...I think they do even through our subconscious thinking

Well that's my two bits...

And Minn...if you're even half as beautiful as the person you've demonstrated to be on this site with your kind thoughts and heart...you're a looker for sure :)

The mirror means nothing if you already have preconceived notions of yourself... that's my problem for sure :)

Keep me posted how you're doing with this and I will too....

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 1153

Minnesota,

Positive talk is an extremely powerful tool. It can help in a variety of situations from anxiety to quiting smoking to big projects. It definitely makes sense that your positive talk helps you through your anxious thoughts.

Members, do any of you use the same tactics to help you through your anxious thoughts?

Brenna, Bilingual Health Educator

15 years ago 0 +0 / -0 341

I find I have a lot of negative thoughts and anxious thoughts about my appearance sometimes.

But then in the mornings I look in the mirror and think I look young for my age and try make my day feel better. Yes i've gained a bit of weight since i've been in MN, but I still look pretty good for my age. I try to remind myself this so I dont make myself anxious in the mornings. Then I use the self talk as well, and say the positive stuff. I think the positive talk can over run the negative anxious thoughts..does that make sense>