Hugs
I think of my past experiences much the same as phantom pain for a lost limb. If you lost a leg you would have to learn to live without it. Or you can live with the pain of not taking precautions so you wouldn't lose it.
But the fact still would be that it is gone. Or you can have phantom pain. I still get tooth aches even though I lost my teeth to infection and magnesium deficiency. Probably preventable. Yet I have managed to isolate the past pain and get on with my life. Maybe I just don't have the time for it anymore or more likely I have accepted that, how now is, is how it is going to be. As for past colleagues. In the work I did in this religion influenced valley I was odd man out. Only because I was good was I hired in an industry that hired it's own first. They spent a lot of time trying to convert me. This did annoy me. It was a form of bullying.
I don't care, I took their money and their crap and sorted it out. The difference with us might be that I was left to do my job because it is impossible to follow a faller around getting in the way. Besides he might get mad and fall a tree on you. But the important thing is that I actually liked what I did. Did you? Honestly? If not then you really will have to forget all of that part of your life, not just the bad parts.
When I meet someone who made life miserable for me I always smile and think, "I won, your still struggling".
Petty I know but it works for me. And all bragging aside I was better than them. Much better. There is one consolation. A person who cheated me on wages is no longer in business and his health has deteriorated. His kids turned out as useless as him also. It makes me smile even though I should feel sorry for him.
Life goes on, not always as I would like but one choice I do have is how I look at it. My mental pain pleasure ratio is not as I would like it but I can live with it. I have to if I want to share this community. And want to seems to be the condition.
Davit.
