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What worries are you holding in and holding on to?


11 years ago 0 1071 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Oh yes!  Great idea!  Right now I carry my Daughter's words on a paper and keep it in my purse.  So, I can take it out and remember, during stressful or anxious times, why I am in Florida :)  I'm trying to think if she has given me a little token I can carry with me.  I know!  When I go to Universal on Monday, I'm going to look for a trinket that reminds me of her, something she'd like.  I really, really love that idea.  That way I still feel close to her and it will remind me of her support.  Excellent!  When I begin challenging myself on some of these amusement park rides, that she loves, just holding on to the token would remind me that she is proud of me being able to do things I was not able to do before.

Thanks so much!

Shari
11 years ago 0 11209 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
The journal sounds like a great idea! What a great way to capture this pivotal period of your life too! Perhaps carrying something of your daughters around (a little token) if you are away from the house and think you might be anxious could be helpful too?
 
And of course we are always here to help or listen you whenever you need.

Ashley, Health Educator
11 years ago 0 1071 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
What comes to mind is writing in a gratitude journal and when I feel anxious, just look at all I've accomplished and it will put me back on track and in the right frame of mind.  Down playing the anxiety by having an alternate positive activity, keeps you on the path to success, and keeps you from getting side tracked and derailed from all of the progress you've made.  It's great to have friends, like you, to help pick us up and dust us off when we fall down.  And, to hold a sign with an arrow, when we get off track, to get us back on the right path.  We do the best we can and when we have a weak day, it's such a comfort to have someone temporarily hold your hand, so you can continue to move forward in a positive manner. Thank you.

Shari
11 years ago 0 11209 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Shari, now you made me tear up. Your daughter sounds like one smart cookie!
 
You are very, very welcome. I feel privlidged to be able to share this journey with you.
 
 
When you get anxious how can you get back to this proud, self love, hopeful feeling? How can you hold on to it?
 
Ashley, Health Educator
11 years ago 0 1071 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Wow!  Thanks Ashley!

I think I've been temporarily side tracked by the anxiety rather than focusing on what I have accomplished.  So, thank you for shifting my focus onto the positives :)  I agree, with not trying to completely control the anxiety, just be aware and let it pass - thanks for that.  I feel gutsy :)  despite the anxiety caused by the positive changes in my life.  It would be so easy to turn tail and run back to the familiar.  But, just by staying here, every day, I have self love and self respect, not to go back to a situation that was not good for me.  I am truly living and not just existing.  I am participating, not sitting on the sidelines.  Hold on, I made myself tear up...I am proud of myself for not taking the easy road.  This may be a harder road, but the rewards are greater.  I have hope now, whereas my life before was hopeless.  I'd like to share my daughter's voice mail.  "Mom, once you pass all of the stress and fatigue, which is all temporary, you will adjust to it.  Don't talk negative about Florida, even if it's temporarily harder.  You don't want to go back to Maryland where you'll be depressed for the rest of your life.  You'll get upset here and there till you're over the hump.  You'll work and have a life.  If you return to LaPlata, you'll have no hope of anything at all.  Take a walk with the dogs and get some fresh air."  :)  Ashley, I'm thankful for you and my daughter for giving me the support I really need right now to meet the challenge.  It's so important.  Words cannot express my gratitude properly.

Shari
11 years ago 0 11209 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thanks Shari! Glad I could help.
 
I think patients with yourself is key here. You're only human and anyone in your situation would be feeling a bit anxious or even really anxious! I know I would for sure! Anxiety sometimes is ok - and even healthy. Everything you said will certainly help but don't feel the need to have complete control over it - be aware of it and let it pass.
 
Also, how have you been present to all you have accomplished? I know you have been doing a lot of celebrating and fun things but have you had a chance to reflect on all of your progress and take some time with yourself. All you are doing and all you have accomplished truly is amazing. Take a few minutes every day just to be present to your greatness and your surroundings. You are doing this! You are LIVING! Just typing this out put a big smile on my face and made me take a deep breath. I really felt it in my chest - the excitement and pride - what do you feel?
 
 
 
 
Ashley, Health Educator
11 years ago 0 1071 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Thanks Ashley!

I appreciate the quick response.  Right now I'm feeling calm and relief.  Just from identifying what the cause is, always makes me feel better.  I agree with you, I am really trying not to focus on anxious feelings, I just keep telling myself, "This is only temporary and will pass."  Taking breaks helps; my daughter tells me to take a walk, with or without the dogs, to get some fresh air which works.  Relaxation techniques are excellent ideas along with breathing exercises and I used to do yoga which is very relaxing and I will fit it back into my routine.  Thought records are a great idea along with the symptom tracker diary.  Thanks for giving me helpful coping skill ideas, my mind drew a blank and I needed a reminder of what to do.  I truly appreciate it.  I'm so glad to be able to post my successes, and my not so successes, with bouts of anxiety.  I know this site works both ways, you help people, but you are also helped.  And, I am so thankful.  We all have ups and downs and life isn't perfect and we do the best we can.  I appreciate the encouragement and now I will be pro active with all of the suggestions you mentioned and will continue to move forward.  I think I was just frustrated, like you said, because I feel like I have already gone through this before and have come out on the other side of it and it made me angry that I have start all over again.  But, I do have all of this sites information, already inside of me, so I hope I can recover quicker.  However, I really think I need to be patient about this process, because if I'm not, it will just add to the anxiety.  Thanks a million Ashley!  You are truly a God send :)

Shari
11 years ago 0 11209 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Shari,
 
I can see how this would be frustrating.
 
From what I can see it is likely due to the recent move and all that has been going one. You have just made a HUGE life change. Everything is new and different - this stress is positive but still stressful. It is likely triggering the anxiety and will likely subside after some time. You have so many things to think about and so many things upcoming - new friends, new job to find, new location, new routine, etc. This would cause anyone to be a bit on edge.
 
Try not to focus on the anxious feelings know that they should subside soon. Continue to take breaks and practice relaxation exercises. You may also want to work on a few thought records to pin point any anxious thoughts that may be harder to find. Also, use your symptom tracker/diary - you might find it helpful to monitor when your fear rises and declines.
 
Also, feel free to post here whenever you are feeling a bit anxious. We're here to listen whenever you need us.
 
How are you feeling now?
 
 

Ashley, Health Educator
11 years ago 0 1071 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Hi Ashley 

The funny thing is that I'm not worried about anything, but my symptoms of anxiety have increased over the last couple of days and that is causing me to worry.  I can't figure out what the cause is:  menopause hormone imbalance, inconsistent sleep, new surroundings, not enough to do, too much to do, staying in too long, going out too much.  It just makes absolutely no sense to me.  I never had any anxiety at all back in Maryland, once I finished this program.  I just don't get it.  I'm happy here, I have the company of my parents.  I don't know if it really matters why it's happening, just that I don't like it that it is happening.  I just get physical symptoms that make me very uncomfortable and I rate it as high anxiety and then it subsides as quickly as it arises.  It hasn't turned into panic and I've not had an attack in over 2 years.  I don't know what more I can do, than just persist with coping skills.  I don't know why it won't go away.  

Shari
11 years ago 0 11209 logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo logo 0
Is there something that you are worrying about but not talking about? Perhaps you are holding back because you don’t want to be a nuisance? Perhaps you don’t want to rock the boat or cause problems? Perhaps your worries could potentially hurt someone else if you bring them up?  

Whatever the case may be, by holding it in it is giving this worry more power over you.
Sometimes just letting it out puts it in perspective. Talking it out in a constructive (not hurtful) way or even just venting some of your thoughts can be such a relief! Who would be willing to listen or who could benefit from hearing your worries?

If you aren’t yet ready to talk about this worry to someone in person you can always post your worries here.  Let it out!

What worries are you holding in and holding on to?
 
Ashley, Health Educator

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